Finals Status:
Record Companies Final Project, Due next week.
Status: Done, handing in tomorrow.
Harmony (music theory) 4 Final project, due today.
Status: Handed in.
Harmony 4 Final test (on Wednesday).
Status: Studied for somewhat.
Business Startups final project, Due on Thursday.
Status: Started
Publishing 10 page paper, Due Monday.
Status: haven't touched.
Voice final audition (next Wednesday).
Status: Songs memorized, but accompaniment, not recorded.
Insanity status:
oh yea, I'm goin crazy.
What else can I write? Hmmm... I'm fiending for a rebound hookup. I dunno. I miss kissies and cuddles.
I don't like being lonely, especially when I'm stressed like I am now.
Lately I've been falling for a certain singer of a certain band whose lyrics feel like they were taken from my head. He wrote the song I had in my spoiler tags last night. I hate that. He's actually someone I know, but I'm never going to tell him his lyrics get me through every day.
I dunno, I guess I really just want to feel needed and loved again... It took me so long to find the last guy, I'm afraid of how long it's gonna take me to find someone else. I'm not in any rush, but I really miss that feeling. And the thing that sucks most is when I do get that feeling, it never seems to last long.
I'm also worried about my birthday. I'm always alone on my birthday, and my birthday is the one day I can't stand to be alone on. It's also the day my dad died, so every year, it's so hard for me to be happy unless I'm a) drunk or b) with someone. But, alas, my birthday is the day everyone forgets about. I don't have the types of friends who would think to throw me a party, and it really sucks when you have to plan your own birthday party, especially when your birthday is a day you'd rather forget. Most people see themselves getting a year older on their birthday, I see myself as being another year without my daddy. All I can think of on my birthday is seeing my dad there in that coma, getting the phone call at 4am that he was on life support because of something the hospital fucked up. I spend more of my birthday crying than celebrating. I thought this year, for the first time in my life, I'd have someone to make it special. I've always been single and miserable on my birthday.
All the best relationships are the shortest. As a wise poet (Pablo Neruda) once wrote in my favorite poem of all-time: "Love is so short, Forgetting is so long". That is how I'm gonna have to live my llife. Keeping that in mind.
x0x0,
Sid
Record Companies Final Project, Due next week.
Status: Done, handing in tomorrow.
Harmony (music theory) 4 Final project, due today.
Status: Handed in.
Harmony 4 Final test (on Wednesday).
Status: Studied for somewhat.
Business Startups final project, Due on Thursday.
Status: Started
Publishing 10 page paper, Due Monday.
Status: haven't touched.
Voice final audition (next Wednesday).
Status: Songs memorized, but accompaniment, not recorded.
Insanity status:
oh yea, I'm goin crazy.
What else can I write? Hmmm... I'm fiending for a rebound hookup. I dunno. I miss kissies and cuddles.
I don't like being lonely, especially when I'm stressed like I am now.
Lately I've been falling for a certain singer of a certain band whose lyrics feel like they were taken from my head. He wrote the song I had in my spoiler tags last night. I hate that. He's actually someone I know, but I'm never going to tell him his lyrics get me through every day.
I dunno, I guess I really just want to feel needed and loved again... It took me so long to find the last guy, I'm afraid of how long it's gonna take me to find someone else. I'm not in any rush, but I really miss that feeling. And the thing that sucks most is when I do get that feeling, it never seems to last long.
I'm also worried about my birthday. I'm always alone on my birthday, and my birthday is the one day I can't stand to be alone on. It's also the day my dad died, so every year, it's so hard for me to be happy unless I'm a) drunk or b) with someone. But, alas, my birthday is the day everyone forgets about. I don't have the types of friends who would think to throw me a party, and it really sucks when you have to plan your own birthday party, especially when your birthday is a day you'd rather forget. Most people see themselves getting a year older on their birthday, I see myself as being another year without my daddy.
All I can think of on my birthday is seeing my dad there in that coma, getting the phone call at 4am that he was on life support because of something the hospital fucked up. I spend more of my birthday crying than celebrating. I thought this year, for the first time in my life, I'd have someone to make it special. I've always been single and miserable on my birthday.
All the best relationships are the shortest. As a wise poet (Pablo Neruda) once wrote in my favorite poem of all-time: "Love is so short, Forgetting is so long". That is how I'm gonna have to live my llife. Keeping that in mind.
x0x0,
Sid VIEW 26 of 26 COMMENTS
chazstrummer:
It's certainly a busy time for you. I hope that you do well on your finals and that takes your mind off of other things for a while. It's still a long time until your birthday, almpst anything could happen. I certainly hope something good happens for you. 
chrysallis:
Hey Sid, sorry to hear about your dad. Don't stress about finals. . .any of us that are in school all sympathize. . .This is my finals week and I feel like I'm going to go crazy. Plus my boyfriend is far far away and I don't get to see him until all my finals are finished. Don't worry, you'll get them all done. Keep your head up. 