mrginger

Dopamine Down

I consumed more than even close to healthy this weekend. It was fun at first but ruined me and my social skills for all of yesterday. I lost the ability to tactfully communicate. I think I made a couple bad impressions.
My liver feels like marble.

time for a detox.

Wow we can drink.

But it was just a brief foray into escapism. and Now the crisis back north must be dealt with.

Its something of a curse. While I'm there, all is well.
As soon as I leave, something somehow gets horribly fucked.
I've almost completely failed in my most substantial investment on account of absence.
Damned Obvious these Signs.

I can't wait until...
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Whatever. I'm not cool at all.

I realized something today. "Mounds", upside-down and backwards is "Spunow". Coincidence? I think Not.

I want to be Anthony Bourdaine.

And Tom Wolfe.

And Werner Herzog.

I am at a new Job lately. They aren't totally confident yet. They doubt. They don't feel safe with me.
They'll rest easy soon enough. I'm going to be their parachute.

Two of...
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EFFF!
I just drove 5 hours back to Humboldt from SF with no incident or obstacle. Until I got within 5 blocks of my house. My foot was heavy on the pedal in anticipation of another mission complete. My subterranean loaf mines were sighing with the relief of their soon-to-be-delivered food baby. I was so close. Overzeal was wearing me like a suit. I drove...
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I have kind of an exhibition/interview on Tuesday where I'll have to showcase my skills and prove my knowledge. I've been doing sushi long enough that I should feel completely confident, but I'm not. I'm feeling anxiety. Whatever. Its good if I'm a little nervous. I know I've got plenty more to learn and there's no way I would bullshit these folks even if I...
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California, a prophet on the burning shore
California, I'll be knocking on the golden door
Like an angel, standing in a shaft of light
Rising up to paradise, I know I'm gonna shine

She never said a negative thing that I can remember.
I should have learned that.

I know a few other folks that can do that. They pay no mind to the negative. How?
The lives they lead seem so simple and easy. The love they find stays.

I had the inside of my left forarm tattooed with a blue anatomically correct heart the other day....
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My Gramma Died. She was a wonderful person. She had alzheimer's, and had suffered a bout of pneumonia recently after which she wouldn't eat. I think she just decided to go. I love you Gramma. If there was ever an argument for why heaven should exist, its you.

I've got this in my head:

Stranger danger,
Danger stranger,
When you gonna follow through?

The mistake you don't make,
Or the rain cloud covers above your house.
Steal the feelings,
Don't focuse on the flames girl.
Have I failed to impress you?
Could've sworn that wine
And one and four made two,
But it's 5!
It's 5!

Can I ride with you
Until the...
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I went to a little potluck last night. Brought a bottle of Bogle Zin and some cherry tomatoes topped with cheese, avocado cream, and herbs. The lady who hosted asked me to usher for the Vulva Monologues. She said I have to wear a red bow-tie, like PeeWee. Could be good.

I've been waiting on some important mail. Shit is constipated.

Have you ever seen...
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My living room furniture gets facefucked by hippo dong. I feel like its slipping my disks everytime I sit down. I guess the 24 pack of PBR was a worthy trade for a little while. Until now. I'd rather sit on the floor like a savage. Anybody want a free couch? Anybody have any dynamite I can explode this thing with?

Feeling a little peckish...
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Fuck! It seems like every obstacle has a obstacle course of its own. Like those russian dolls. Its like a tunnel that leads to a point. Like a long closed funnel.

They're after me but never before.



Fucking Jim Morrison.
relate to him much
my wisdom escaped his antics. But still....
I know its cheesy.

I slept next to a girl I used to love...
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