Hey peeps hope everyone is doing well and had a good weekend. In this blog I’ll be just talking. Just about my life, mental health, upcoming sets, etc. Don’t worry I’ll be back to writing my favourite SG sets as always. I like to just talk on my blogs about whatever is on my mind. This is one of these blogs. No gimmicks, just me writing about my life, thoughts.
So where to begin.
How is my mental health and my 2019?
It’s been hit & miss tbh with yous. In the other hand I love that my favourite SG sets are popular and I’m getting great feedback. My 10th edition was front page which is so cool. It cheered me up a bit. Is it sad that, that was the best thing that happened to me this year so far? I know it’s common for the models to have their set, blogs, etc to get a lot of likes, comments, fp, etc cause yous are gorgeous but usually my blogs is usually has a small crowd. Only get under either 20 or 10 likes but mostly it’s by unfollowers, who do it cause their generous that way. Even though they don’t follow me. I don’t mind tbh. I love that I’m writing stuff that ppl like. Even if it is one person I don’t care. I’m connecting to that one person. That makes me feel good. So having a blog of mine getting front page and a lot of likes/feedback is mind blowing. Cause I’m not used to ppl giving me good feedback. In fact I’m used to ppl treating me like shit tbh. I’m always been a victim of getting bullied. Even in my 30’s. I get bullied. Due to being different & not following the “normal” footsteps.
My long time readers will know but to those who are new to me. I’ve been battling mental health issues all my life. Even right now. I’ll put links of my previous blogs about my mental health issues and that below here:
If yous want to read it, it’s there. Most were wrote before I actually write about favourite SG sets got me more followers & feedbacks. But I still think those blogs are good to me cause it’s letting out my story.
So yeah my life has improved but it does still needs more. Like a good group of understandable, reliable, loyal friends or a good woman. Hell even a group of lady pals cause I feel like I get better conversations and giving a shit from the female kind these days. Fellas around me in my life don’t give a fuck and it’s shit u know. I do have friends but there far away from me and never really there. I only see them on rare occasions now. Not all guys are scum but it feels like I get better care, loyalty, maturity, etc from females these days. I do get that from guys but not as much. It’s shit. So yeah I do still need improvement.
I’m always indoors, alone 95% of the time, feel tired for no reason and I’m usually feeling ill. Have stomach problems due to overeaten junk food cause I’m upset most of the time so I eat. I want to be healthier but I got barely any cash or idea u know. Cause I’m so used to eating junk, usually that’s all I know. I’m very self taught. Since I’m used to no one talking to me or guiding me. I always learn things on my own. I am proud of myself of that. Even though it would’ve been nice to have a pro to teach me and guide me. But I’m proud that my head & heart is in the right place. Always have. Even though I feel awful due to my situations with ppl in my personal life treating me like it’s my fault. When I know it’s not. I have made mistakes and I’m always the first in line to say I fucked up. It makes me loss confidence in being around ppl u know. Even though it’s their problem, it makes me feel like I’m to blame. Even though I don’t feel like relying on ppl is my fault. I’m always have been cool, kind, easygoing to ppl. Just ppl don’t give it to me back and makes me feel worthless most of the time. Like nothing is good enough for them. But I’ve learned that it’s not my problem. It’s theirs. Everything I do is all in good intentions. I hate drama and fallouts. Like I just try to avoid pointless arguments. Hints why I’m mostly been offline cause on the social medias, I see ppl blowing things out of proportion all the time on things that don’t matter. I don’t bother with that. I leave that to them. I just mute & block ppl like that nowadays. No matter who it is. Life’s too short for debates and pointless arguments.
Like in one of my blogs I write about how being positive is saving my life. Cause it really is. Before I joined this site and other sites. I was a pure wreak. I was on my Facebook and all I did was rant, raved, being negative cause I felt negative, argued with ppl who disagreed or had a view that I hated, etc. I mean I was losing it and handled my personal fb so badly. I was saying brutally honest stuff cause I was so unhappy but I was with support/social care at that time. Nothing was going right and I was having meltdowns a lot. Basically harming myself online without self harming. I was a pure wreak and I know it. My folks know that I had to go offline and rewind, rethink my life. Then I went back online. Join sites like this. And I was reading a lot of things & watching things online about ppl who are mentally unwell & how they get better. And a lot of them was try to go everything good. Even if I don’t feel happy. Do ur best to be positive to ppl & walk away from the negative ppl. And it’s through the power of positivity that makes me feel better & I’m improving everyday. Instead of ranting about how I’m alone in my life. Maybe explain why I am and I have & I realised it’s not my fault. In my circumstances I can’t fault that I was like that. My life was awful back then. Getting better cause I’m cooking more, helping support & promote yous SG models cause yous have been in similar situations too.
Yeah I realised that I’m not the only one. I talk to a lot of the ppl on the sites I’m on and realised it’s not just me. And I love that we can relate and communicate each other that way. We all facing the same battle but in different ways. We are all one. We all struggle but we can overcome. It’s possible. Having Positivity is a great thing. I do my best to get along with everyone and I do. Always do my best to keep positive.
Yes there is still improvements to be made in my life. But I’m taking it easy. One step at a time. No rush. That’s the best way. Be surrounded by ppl who are loyal, caring and love me for who I am is good too. As long as I keep that up, work hard, overcome, etc my life will keep improving. Just need to remember to never the bastards put me down. Never give up!
So yeah that’s my life atm. Taking it one step at a time.
So upcoming blogs, well I’ll be doing my usual favourite SG sets ones. I’m also going to do a blog about my love on the Resident Evil games (that’ll be next), a music blog, An appreciation blog on my favourite SG photographer @tripodski , doing a series of my personal favourite SG models (starting with @reallifepirate ) , share some positivity vibes blogs and so forth. Just whatever comes to mind. I am aiming to do more blogs. I love giving yous that and I love the feedbacks I get. Yous guys are the best. My followers are always growing and I can’t thank yous enough.
Feel free to follow me on Twitter at KungFurySG and Snapchat at BadarseMofo87. Also I have a food account on IG at badarsechef. I don’t do many vegan dishes so if you hate meat. Maybe don’t follow if you’re sensitive to that. It’s ok, I still love ya lol. 😉
Also if you do like my previous blogs I link to above, thank you. It does mean a lot to me. Really, their hard to write about. It is hard to talk about my mental health issues. So any love or positive feedback means the world to me. So thank you.
So thank you again for reading my blogs and leaving my awesome feedback. Again yous are the best. Until the next blog. Take care, much love and appreciate whatever good thing you have cause who knows what tomorrow will bring. Be positive, always!!! 😎🤘🏻
@missy @rambo
