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jercrow15521

Netherlands Antilles

Member Since 2002

Followers 2 Following 0

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Thursday Jan 09, 2003

Jan 9, 2003
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New Year eh? Is it, is it really??

I can't really tell since nothing is different. Just once I wish to be visited by some grand epiphany or earth shattering change on New Year's Eve. Why bother celebrating it when the next day is merely a load of the same old crap--albiet from a blurier and mayhap slightly hungover perspective.

I feel so wishy-washy lately. One day I tell myself I'm done with life at sea and the next I just let myself get pulled along in the undertow. I really need to break this complacency--I know that no one else will and yet I still wait for circumstance to eliminate the need to decide.

At the same time, when I review past journal entries, I thikn that I have made up my mind, but don't have the patience to make those mileage markers. I want change to happen NOW!

Ahh well, I have a meeting with our head office the next time the ship is in Miami, so alot of what is said--or not said as the case may be--will carry alot of weight. I'm already scheduled to return to this ship which means that the Med and Southern Europe are only about 5 months away. I'll put up with alot of politics and bullshit for one more season there, who knows when I will ever get a chance to return?

I've also been asked to go to Germany in August to help get our next ship up and running and ready for its public debut. I guess that means I've made an impression with some who's opinions matter.

I guess I'll just drift along for the short haul and see where the current takes me. I just have to make sure that I don't let it take me for the long haul and wash away my desires.

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