snakeplissken

It's hard to be of a nurturing personality type and not be able to do anything when the person you care about most is suffering. It's such a frustrating feeling of helplessness. It makes me a little insane.

But I need to learn to leave well enough alone. Don't pick at things, don't let curiosity get the better of me. Think before I speak instead...
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So my ribs hurt. Not a lot, but a low constant ache. I'm about 99% sure it's my diaphragm from all the running, so I'm not really worried, but I do wish it would go away. I imagine it will with strengthening.

Yoga has been doing well for me. I'm glad I took it. I'm learning to pay attention to the physical me a lot...
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Here's to the end of a heavy week. My hips are open from yoga, a keg is in the fridge, and I'm healing up for a good run.

I should drink a toast because I don't have moobs anymore.

Occasionally life sticks a thumb in your ass to get your attention when you're not focusing on what's important.

I signed up for this. Just the 5K run though, don't get too excited. I started running late in December and I decided I need a challenge like this in my life. Perhaps as something to work towards, or for moving outside of my comfort zone. I'm not a physical guy. At all. Not that long ago I was joking that I would never...
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What did you do last Saturday?




I saw Motorhead with MisterSatan, ate wings, and smoked a bunch of beer. Jealous?

I need more projects to distract me, but I don't know what to do.

Ran a couple of miles this morning. It's about the only thing that makes sense right now to me to do. I guess my theory is that physical pain will trump everything and it'll be the only thing I can feel, so I run until I hurt. I should try and...
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Fuck it, stop moping jason. Get on with your life even if you don't want to. Try to love yourself even if you don't. Just try for fucks sake. That's the only way anything will ever get better. You've been through the alternative and you almost didn't survive. You wouldn't have if it wasn't for someone. You don't have that now. You blew it. Do...
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After some kind words from friends and strangers I decided for now I'm going to stay. Or at least try to. Maybe to prove I'm strong enough to myself or maybe because I just don't have anywhere else to go. I don't know.

Am I better? No. Quite the contrary actually. I'm about as sad as I've ever been in my entire life. As sad...
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