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merry christmas you crazy people...

my heart is sad...but i am trying to be kinda happy...i go back to cali friday...this has been the worst vacation of my life...
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r3x:
Hope your flight back wasn't too crazy. Last time I flew through MI, my flight was overtaken by a 4 yr old who cried all the way back to CA. frown

The Japanese kids sitting next to me looked at me like I could do something to shut her blond ass up, but nope! She was the devil.
ineedtocomeup:
hey girl....I'm so glad you're back in Cali!!! Let me know if I can do anything for you homie!! smile Glad you're back all safe and sound. smile smile
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someone i care about is getting married today to a person who cannot call herself good. he has known her for less than 2 weeks...

i am scared for him. but i wish him the best... but i am the bad person here because i wanred him and was scared for him. he cannot see into my heart or know how i possibly feel. i...
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r3x:
2 WEEKS?! 2 WEEKS?!?!
...wtf, yo.

alecks:
you wanna get to know each other for a day then get married?
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sundae:
geez your friends are hillarious!! Though that guitar hero pic is one of the geekiest I'v ever seen lol biggrin

Happy holidays!! kiss
tonedizzy:
looks like nothin but good times to me! lol
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ok so drunk blog posts are fun(see previous lol)
anyways...having our christmas party here today im excited. still need to get ahold of a few people. but it will be good.
i have hiccups.
after the whole matt thing happened when i got home i have been having some issues having pannick attacks its really shitty i had to take medicine and i have been...
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jormagund:
The wisdom to do as you request is gained, frequently, with age.

But then again, being early 20's has certain other advantages...
merkury:
Hope you have awesome time at your party. Wish you were staying in michigan longer so we could meet up for few drinks and kick it or something. Last nights blog was very funny sounded like it was possibly a good time leading up to it =p
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i am sho drunkx
i went1 to the bar and idrank a lotshes.
yes,
andi found out htings and i feel sad but i am glad to be home and i mis people in cali too. but i dot now what i want. i do a lotta crapy and unthoughtful things but i am not as bad as some peopel andi need to not beat...
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joshxcor:
You are silly. tongue

We miss you too!
shanni:
oh man, i can imagine trhe tough times your going through (couldnt help but notice your comment on Freddys blog-it broke my heart)
i dont know you but ive kinda been in similar situationa nd i jus want you to know that if you wanted to talk im down, seeing as i have no life lol

But either way, even if you just ignore this comment-keep a smile on that pretty ass face! Beauty is what runs the world hahaha and you def have a large amount of it so keep the shit rollin muh darlin. You seem too sweet also to be sad =(
males suck=/

but yea, hope you arent snowed in lol. Im sooo bundled up right now
-Shani
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sigh*
anyways....things are going good. ben hanging out with my friends and what such. i dont wanna leave yetfrown but i been having so much fun it seems time is flying by like crazy.

seeing my nephew is the ebst gift i could ask for. he is so god damn adorable.
my sister makes me laugh cos i never seen her this happy.

i still...
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triplegold:
so your leaving
psylentmike:
That's all you really can do. Just cut those people and their shit out as soon as they start to bring you down.
Good to see you're doing better. smile
Merry Almost Christmas.
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there is no point in being angry anymore....

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psylentmike:
Hope you're doing better today. :\
joshxcor:
Lame. frown

Don't cry.

You'll be fine.

I'm sorry....people suck.

My couch is super comfy whenever you need it by the way. smile
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i made it home(back in MOSHIGAN)...i drank too much last night.

i knew this was gonna happen.
and it prolly wont be the last time this week either...sigh*

yup.
thats all i got.

i went out with an old friend last night. it was....funsmile i drunk dialed a lotta people...if u were one of them. i am sorry. ha.
or not.


i miss this fucking...
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merkury:
eeek Sweet! How long you gonna be in michigan for?
laponne:
call me anytime
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well....im on my way home from san d via train...(barf). 9 more hrs wasted traveling.
going home just to get ready to leave again.


i am going home. i couldnt be happier.








frown
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brittymon:
thanks for the add kiss
clio:
that whole festival was so ridiculously good biggrin
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antipunk:
"we all need a place we are wanted to feel whole."

What if no one desires us anywhere?
What if we could not make anyone desire us?
Then what? Should we commit suicide?
Should we kill the gift of experiencing life because others did not want us?
Or worse, should we live miserably because we were undesired?
Scolding the brilliance of light, cursing the beauty of a rose, damning the waves on a beach...rejecting beauty because we could not be wanted?
Should we not feel whole experiencing these places?
Should we really place our feelings on the reliance of others?

People aren't perfect, they will fail to do for us as we desire.
What then remorse, lament and torment?
What reason should we have to sacrifice our happiness should none feel to give it to us?
Life is joy, misery is pain, love is empty, death is relief, sanity is destruction and money is colorful.
Addiction is absolution.

I can't save you. I won't placate your cries for help with empty words.
Truth is viciousness in blood, retching the mind free from love. It kills without seeing our hands bloodied up.
We scream in revolt or pass softly into its arms giving up. Some will fight but none can win.
Come hell or high water we are all freed from misery one way or another.
For you save yourself.

Imagine the results of your dilemma intently.
You learn truth in the most turbulent of times.
This moment in your life you'll learn what you truly value and what really matters.
What ever you decide...
give everything you've got to getting what you want or you'll regret.

The mind is a palace awaiting completion. You are the architect and know how best to build it.
Pray for whatever you desire, courage, direction, faith, love, peace and it will be so. If you build your life incorrectly, to your subconscious plans, only then will you find that you fail. In this have faith that all actions are for your benefit, whether they appear bad or good.

Let go of expectations, let go of desire or struggle to keep them. Peace will come one day and you will release them, for they are not yours to hold.

It is not your burden in life to be burdened through life. You have the precious Now it needs you desperately. It is going to die without your help. The help that only your love can give it. Keep to it, provide it tender care. It is alive and needs you for it to thrive into something wonderfully breathtaking! Without you it will wither up and decay. The now is alive and every moment is its beautiful blossom. Let us tend with the care of gardeners to our lives cultivating good will, pruning unwanted growths and admiring each aspect with intent observation. Oh how wonderful the colors are, changing, fading clashing and blending! How intoxicating the sound is; sweet, sincere and enthralling, I could get lost within it! Oh what a sensation touch is, soft, hard, fast, smooth, I love it! The bliss of taste and the desire of smell there is no substitute!

What a magnificent gardener you are. kiss
ineedtocomeup:
I doooos need ur number dude. Shoot it hottie!!! smile
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well folks...ill be in san diego till monday. fun times.

ill be up to la a few times between for some stuff.

then i leave on the 12th for michigan.
yup.


lifes just one big adventure...atleast ill have a min between san d and mi to do laundry....lol...
yea

XO
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kaise17:
laundry...darn i might wanna do that...i'm not sure where most of my clothes is right now. darn underwear gnomes
5729d:
Got some family in SD. They could totally show you where all the old people hang out.

The 12th!