I'm kind of reluctant to post this, but I guess I'm going to do it anyway.
Once upon a time, I used to be religious. I was raised Catholic, and I used to believe. I prayed to a good to thought was listening, I had a cross that I wore, I even read the Bible. But somewhere along the lines, I lost my faith. I guess there's only so much a child can hear that the bad things happening to him are God's will, and that he's just testing us...
Testing us for fucking what? How much do you need to test the faith of a child?
Eventually, I started thinking for myself, and questioning things. What kind of loving God would allow the atrocities committed in this world? What kind of loving God allows His followers to persecute, and cause harm to others, just for being different?
I lost my faith, and left behind my spirituality in the process.
I'm sorry if that offends anyone who still believes. I don't want to make you question your own faith just because I'm talking about losing my own.
The truth is, I don't bear any ill will towards the Christian God. I just know that He's not mine, and I'm not His. And that's okay.
But lately, I've been craving getting that spirituality back into my life. So, I began an admittedly passive search for a new source.
Strangely enough, this happened through TikTok, of all places. My interests led the algorithm to show me a lot of witch content. I ignored it mostly, at first. I guess I still had the negative belief drilled into me from Christianity. But the more I watched, the more I liked what I saw.
I never felt loved, or accepted for who I was at church. Or on any kind of religious event, for that matter. But the messages put forth by pagans are all so inclusive. It was amazing to see.
Then one day, a video crossed my path with a message from Hecate. For the first time in my life, I heard the message, and felt it effect me. I've never experienced that before. I actually felt emotional after watching the video.
If you believe what they say, that means this deity might be reaching out to me. I'd like to believe that. I know that I want to start along this path, but I have no idea how to get started.
If anyone who reads this has any suggestions, please let me know.
Man, there's so much more that I could say on both sides of this topic, but this is a long enough post as it is...
