even as life has shifted into something more solid & steady than it's ever been, it needs that charge, that occasional "what the hell," those moments of "shit, did that really just happen?"
I'm not saying by any means that having steadiness is a bad thing, but alone it's a waste...
nor am I saying by any means that anarchy is a good thing, without control it's pointless...
a life needs a middle ground, every day needs something unique & interesting, every once in awhile you need something to throw you for a loop...
even if you figure out the solution in quick order, it's still something to keep every day from becoming nothing more than 'Every Day'
as my life began to solidify into a steadiness, it was when my spawnlings came into the picture
chaos & entropy in the eye of the hurricane that my life had been previously
I daresay I'm not out of the storm yet, I just can't see the walls of it anymore and the center is calmly satisfying
but the water can be rocky enough often enough to keep me from falling asleep at the wheel
I may have the ship under control, but without a touch of adventure it's just another toy
some people thrive in chaos, some people thrive in the everyday same - I prefer a mix...
as crazy as it sounds I like to occasionally be off-balance, though I strive to find ways through - and always will
without the challenge, then what's the point of it all ?
I'm not religious so I'm not about to lay down & rest thinking there's some end-all "happyplace" so I can safely stop
NO, to me - as I've said in many a posting - Life is about Living! - enjoying the 7 hells out of this world as much as possible
aye, occasionally at others' expense ( apologies in advance ;) )
while, yes, having a home & bills paid, food on the table, steady employment, & entertainment to distract are necessities...
I couldn't have my girls without these ( well, maybe without the latter ) - and without my spawn is not something I ever want to be
...but does that mean I should change who I am, be who someone else thinks I should, because of them ?
NO, they're a part of me - which means I want them to see who I am ( even if a bit diluted until they're older ;) )!
if they think I'm crazy ( which they've said I am, heh! ), then so be it... if anything, I'll be an unforgettable fathre to them
as long as they know I'm there is the key...
aye, now that I've started yearly travels I get a dose of what I never had before - which is demn fun :)
and maybe, someday, when they're older they can handle my chaotic travels, my 'pick-a-direction-and-go' roadtrips, my 'I have no idea what I'll do when I'm there' vacations
*laughs* ... or maybe not, maybe it'll never be their thing *shrugs*
at any rate, I'll continue to enjoy the static flux that I've made my life into...
mayhaps there'll be big changes on the horizon, maybe not - maybe someday I'll move somewhere else again, as my wanderlust does tease me greatly !
mayhaps I'll go somewhere warmer - or simply bigger ... couldn't tell ya, I don't know what tomorrow'll bring, let alone year(s) from now
as long there's a Life to keep Living, I'm gonna Live it - and Love it!
if it means I continue to Live it largely alone, well, I'm used to it - if it means someONE in the future, so be it...
assuming they can handle my crazy-ass reality & realize that even in the most serious of times I'm gonna throw a curve ball into the mix
would anyone expect anything else from me ? *laughs*
...Farethee well for now, my Lovelies & Gentlefolk - enjoy your long weekends or days off or workdays or whichever and ever it may be!
sole twittage of the week::
12/16 : first official day of building/complex being smoke-free ... it's not as if anyone didn't know it was coming - 6mths ago they gave word that the last lease renewal was 12-15 & either move or sign the new policy, yet some neighbours are PO'd ...they had their chance/they signed !
watched recently :
via rental/streaming:
The House With A Clock In Its Walls
Venom
Chilling Adventures Of Sabrina (1st Season)
The Librarians (4th Season)
Elseworlds (CW Crossover)
Ant-Man & The Wasp
Wynonna Earp (1st Season)
ownedflix:
Zombieland
Warm Bodies
True Blood (2nd Season)
The Last Sharknado: It's About Time
-thom Wolfox sR Rhose, AK/GOT (OOP)
unusualist - I have yet to find a religion and/or spirituality that fits my own personal beliefs... other than, of course, the fact I am a (fallen) god.