I now have a passport... now if only I could afford to travel, neh?
my zune120 music player died last weekend, so had an entire music-free workweek *sighs* - then strangely came back to life yesterday AM... so, yeh, I need to look for a new player in case it happens again
I still haven't won a lottery ( maybe someday I'll even buy a ticket )
SO... on with the "show," as it were ;)
If there's anything I've discovered in life it's that 75% of the time people either don't expect or don't want an honest answer when a question is asked/come up...
I do admit that people who don't know me well tend to be shocked/surprised at my answers, let alone that I'd actually answer honestly
( their expressions tend to make it worth it, even if they end up never asking me "those kind" of questions in the future ever again *laughs* )
...yeh, I'm "that" kind of guy :)
my answers are based on personal experiences (or desires), so it's not as if they're often risque, sexual, or blasphemous ( well, maybe the latter more than the former ;) )
BUT due to the damages and unusual situations I've been in and/or faced, my answers are often dark(er) than the "norm" or what people infer as depressing or horrifying
no, I'm not depressed - or horrified - by my life and what I've dealt with ( or am still dealing with )
...quite the opposite - I tend to laugh at the situations in my life, particularly the ones that ended in life-changing damage or death(s)!
aye, I'm always in pain... which has increased, oddly enough, since this year started... BUT I've always been in pain, so know I'll get used to what I haven't already
aye, I have relatively-new limited movement and pain in my arms and for over a decade now I often have no feeling in my legs
'course, there's the more than obvious teeth issues ( or lack thereof, as the case may be ) and associate pain and sometimes swelling
no, I haven't been to a doctor ( excepting emergency room/urgent care situations ) - not since late '90
so, yeh, it's been 27 years... and, no, unless I win a lottery or am even more unlikely given free medical, I won't be going to a doctor anytime in the near future
without the $$ ( or free healthcare ) to back it up, what would be the point of going to a doctor?
to find out there's something wrong with me that I couldn't do a thing about anyways ?? I'd rather NOT know, thank you very little
and the fact that I avoid meds like the plague and outright refuse to take something unless it's too a point where it's affecting my being able to function at work/home
( earlier in the week I actually asked a co-worker for head-drugs [headache meds] because it had gotten too bad that day )
I've dealt with more death than the average person - but since the first death nearly 29yrs ago I've only faced one year without, so, yeh, I'm used to it
each and every death has affected me differently...
I've lost a sister, which affected me the most of any death in my life thusfar
I've lost a mother - 8yrs and 2days ago, actually, which was the 2nd time I was witness to someone taking their last breath
I've lost the only best friend I had, g/fs, co-workers that I spent time with outside work, and people who impacted my life in ways they probably never knew or realized
the first death nearly 29yrs ago was the first time I witnessed someone take their last breath
for years, when younger, I blamed myself for many of the deaths - some for reasons more appropriate than others
so - yes - it drove my life in particular directions... sometimes not for the better
needless to say I survived a bevy of accidents and attacks/robberies ( sorry to disappoint, but I'm still alive ;) )
I've broken bones, including having my skull cracked open and literally stapled shut
I've had concussions ( which, after the last attack/robbery I was told I'm not more susceptable to - go figure! )
I have/had severe memory loss - initially from the aforementioned skull cracked open, but again from attack/robbery concussion...
it's not as if I really need to remember anything before I was 15... haven't remembered since '96, so don't think I'm missing anything
and what little I remember between 15-18 are snippets of this'n'that
...the worst bit was when bits of memory returned - always physically painful, which completely sucks... trust me *ouch*
but scarred as I may be, physically and mentally, I'm a stubborn, willful SOB and am not about to give up anytime soon
I've met people from those missing periods that I don't remember, but I also tend to forget people I haven't seen in years, so that's no shocker there
either way, I'm willful, to say the least, and am pretty demn sure that's what has kept me going...
I've "insulted"/"offended" people because I utterly refuse to believe that any [g-d] had a hand in my survival...
sorry, but *I*'m the reason I'm still here, my willpower and the assistance of the doctors involved, and that's it, that's all
I've been called "lucky" for my survival - but if I was truly "lucky," would I have even been IN the multitude of accidents and incidents in my life TO survive ?!?
yeh, I doubt it... and, again, there's no [g-d] testing me... if there was, it failed - BADLY - because these accidents and incidents have instilled quite the opposite in me than belief
yet, despite all of this I'm a pretty boring individual who, when he goes out or goes places, does so alone - and almost always has
let people believe what they may, think I lead this exciting life full of friends and family...
when they do ask, they seldom believe me anyways *smirks*
But - I'm more than a month behind updating my checkbook, have a bevy of laundry to do, and don't feel like doing either
SO... enjoy the 7 hells outta life until my next posting !
random twittage ::
3/16 : "Your Passport Application Has Been Approved" - guess who has their first passport and can travel int'l, if they can ever afford to do so ?
3/16 II : for the helluvit looked into my past employment history - over 1/2 the places are closed/non-existent and only 2 of the existing ones are owned by the same people/in same location
3/17 : there's a world of difference between "you shouldn't masturbate to that" and "you can't masturbate to that" - the latter may be construed as a challenge
3/18 : last night's weird dream :
sis Danielle & I living in an on-campus apartment, where I worked as a security guard (!), with movie-star and pr0n-"star" neighbours
( sorry, sis, have no idea if you were going to school or working *shrugs* )
3/19 : *demn* my zune120 played its last tune :( ...so no more music for work or walks until I somehow find another or suitable replacement *sigh*
3/21 : do I look like someone who... er, yeh, I suppose I probably do - that's one of the many reasons I avoid mirrors like the bleedin' plague
3/24 : AM weirdness - familiar beeping this AM and lo! and behold! my zune120 kicked in, w/ very low battery... should probably still look for new
3/25 : weirdly kinda funny having a dream involving all of one's ex-g/fs, living and dead, without being an iota sexual but my being a millionaire
3/25 II : "you discovered a friend/co-worker/ex/relative did pr0n, would you look it up if they weren't around?"
less embarrassing for them if they were
twittage rant ::
{{ 3/18 : "Trump intends to kill Sesame Street and NPR!"
And now some researchable facts :
PBS will lose ~12% of their funding by losing these sources - while this is a big chunk, it isn't something should kill PBS, if anything it'll force them to focus their programming intent... Sesame Workshop (formerly CTW), who are independent of PBS, have been independent of these sources for decades and will lose less than 1% of their funding - IF that's enough to kill Sesame Street, there's a BIG problem.
NPR will lose ~2% of their funding by losing these sources - again, if that's enough to kill NPR, they've got a BIG problem !
...so who WILL lose funding? your local TV stations and programming - which I'm willing to bet many of you haven't even turned your TV to recently, let alone are even aware IF you have a local TV station nor its programming ( you won't likely find it on cable or satellite, fyi ) ... I know MY local TV stations, WHEN they're even on the air, are 'meh' at best - there've been times they've switched to online DOT highway cams for an hour or two or even "piggybacked" a neighbour station's feed, showing a computer-like screen for minutes where commercials would be ( kinda wonder if that's legal? )... not really worth watching, since it's either online or on the neighbour station.
I suppose if they want to survive, they'll have to consider what helped make PBS so big when it initially started as a simple local station - and maybe come up with actual, educational, interesting programming to watch. }}
Weeks' Random Playlist (albums) ::
Warrant - The Best Of
Warrant - Dog Eat Dog
Poison - Greatest Hits 1986-1996
Poison - Flesh & Blood
Danger Danger - Danger Danger
Danger Danger - Screw It!
Tango Down - Identity Crisis
The Escape Club - Wild, Wild West
Tango Down - Bulletproof
watched recently :
via netflix/hulu/amazon:
Powerless (1st Season)
Legion (1st Season)
Sharknado: The 4th Awakens
The Expanse (1st Season)
Grimm (6th Season)
Tenacious D In The Pick Of Destiny
Iron Fist (1st Season)
The Mighty Ducks
D2: The Mighty Ducks
Disney's Flubber
Doctor Who (multiple Doctors)
Shadowhunters (1st Season)
ownedflix:
Tales From The Crypt (3nd Season)
G.I. Joe: Retaliation
The Adventures Of Brisco County, Jr (1st/Only Season)
Mr Popper's Penguins
Rio
Rio 2
Old School
Get Him To The Greek
Pump Up The Volume
Career Opportunities
Fringe (1st Season)
-thom Wolfox sR Rhose
unusualist - I have yet to find a religion and/or spirituality that fits my own personal beliefs... other than, of course, the fact I am a (fallen) god.