vim

note to self:

in the future, please DO NOT free-ball in khaki, microfiber slacks on a hot day...chicks HATE butt-sweat.

so like...last time i checked, smiles are like, free right??...so like why are so many people like so totally cheap about givin' 'em out?!?!

xoxo,
Oggy & Vimmy

last night i dreamt of Snow White again...

*sigh*

one o' these days i wanna wake up and have the bite marks still be there.

ticks and fleas, ticks and fleas
everybody hates those ticks and fleas
ticks and fleas, Lyme's disease
flies adrift, upon the breeze
big fat spider oh so hairy
hissing cockroach oh so scary
look there's a beetle, look there's a fly
and a swarm of killer bees in the sky
ticks and fleas, ticks and fleas
i really fucking hate those ticks and fleas
ticks...
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what is it about this strange, alluring place...that makes me wanna take opium suppositories and dance nekkid to crazy techno-trance in my living room with all the freakin' windows open??

my poor, poor neighbors

why dost thou come hither to this journal....
my words are both vile and infernal...
filled with tales of some carnal Snow White...
who wears black vinyl panties and loveth to bite...
dost thou long to bear witness to mine pain...
or art thou completely insane?

Og...

Philosopher. Poet. Caveman.

last night i dreamt of Snow White again...we danced salsa on the beaches of Cuba...in a tiny, latin red dress...and her in a big, ruffled man-shirt.



she said i looked muy caliente en rojo.

i really miss college parties...booze, betties, beer-bongs, senseless nudity...

this whole 30 something party scene is SO weak...wine, sour baguettes with assorted cheeses, fancy veggies with hummus, married couples, kids running around, political discussions...and i look in the mirror this morning, and all of a sudden i have more grey hair than my father.


(the above does not include Vim's parties btw)

i don't wanna be friends or anything...i just wanna eat caviar off your nipples...sashimi off your ass...oysters off the back of your knee...scallops off your thigh...swordfish steaks off your stomach...grilled eel off your back...and crab butter off those gorgeous, quivering lips...

God i fucking love seafood.

why do flies...suddenly appear...

every time...you are near...

unlike me...they long to be...

close to you...


fuckaduck!!!...i can't believe i forgot deodorant this morning...ladies and gentlemen...please evacuate the building in an orderly fashion.

grilled summer vegetable kebabs with roasted red pepper and thai basil dipping sauces...

smoked chicken and orzo salad with sweet corn and toasted pinenuts...

grilled asparagus and goat cheese salad with sauteed beets and a balsalmic reduction...

ahi tuna ceviche with fresh lime juice, mango and papaya...

grilled jerk chicken with habanero mango salsa...

well stocked floating pool bar...

excellent outdoor speakers...

topless chicken fights......
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last night i dreamt of Snow White again...in black, vinyl minishorts and a red Motorhead shirt...she had me tied up her basement...feeding me nothing but cheezy fries, vodka, and fairytale sex...and for once my good people...i was happy.

i love the smell of combat boots and Victoria's Secret perfume in the morning.