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venenumliscens

Pottstown,PA

Member Since 2004

Followers 196 Following 312

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A little something about fathers day

Jun 20, 2016
3
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Yesterday I was asked on Instagram by the beautiful @chef what my Suicidegirls name was so she could properly make the connection between that me and the me on here. I had explained that I use my xjwigluszx name on just about every other source of social media, username, etc. But with this site I want to be different and the ensuing blog will be one of those reasons. I also didn't want some casual friend to google xjwigluszx and stumble across my profile on here. At least when I was younger, I didn't need someone stumbling across my naked ass or one of my old pissed of rants. Not so much an issue now because I'm not as comfortable with my body and out of respect for my wife. She always worried and would comment that I had some secret life on here I was trying to keep from her which isn't the case, but at the same time, I do enjoy having an outlet where in my 12 years here, I've known or met maybe 4 or 5 people in real life. And I've learned my lesson about privacy settings as I used to be open to anyone even non-members and that burned me. My now wife found a post in our early years involving me missing my ex around birthday and holidays because she spoiled me and went out of her way for me... Together 10+ years and married 7+ and I still don't live that shit down. Another was a pretty angry vent against the family I was living with after they took me and then flip flopped things where they weren't just being helpful friends they portrayed them selves to be. Well I learned my lesson about that. This next part is reason I like my "secret" life and the anonymity that comes with it because this would definitely rustle some feathers in my in-law family. Here we go now...

Normally for Father's Day I would post some derogatory post in life about my useless father. Not this year because frankly... What's the point he'll never see it. But honestly, my dad sucks and would occasionally goes week or maybe months without his visitations, hard to say, I was young. And then after graduating and proving my younger brother dropped out and was working... He took off and haven't seen him in 15 years now. My stepdad took care of us, but was never really fatherly and never did much selflessly to be a father. Plus he was just a drunk and now since my moms passing he rather wallow in self defeat than step up and be the guy he believes he was, if for no one else at least step it up for my son... His grandson. My uncle was like a father for a bit, but then started dating someone seriously and though he was still there, weren't nearly as close. And now remarried to his first wife to be divorced again and not have his shit together... So nothing there. My grandfather on the other hand was the closest male figure in my life that never didn't let me down. Unfortunately he passed when I was only like 20 and could never really understand and appreciate the man he was. Needless to say, I wasn't really gifted with good male role models. This brings me to my father in law Clyde. Clyde is a good guy who takes a lot of shit and yet is there for the people in his life. For me, he's been a great friend, someone I trust. He treats my wife great despite only being her step dad and he's a awesome grandfather to my son. Here's the part that has me pissed off a bit, he has 3 daughters of his own who in my opinion take him for granted. Granted I don't see everything that goes on and I know to keep out of these things, but we were visiting with my in-laws from like 1p-5:30p yesterday. We'd have been there anyway because it's hot as fuck and they have a pool. My wife and I hadn't heard about anyone stopping by earlier than us and they weren't there when we were there, so at what point do his girls choose to acknowledge him. My wife's mother would've said something before if they were there first. I saw 2 of his 3 daughters posted Facebook statuses... Like 9:30 and 10:00 at night. Seriously? You both live maybe... I don't know closer than we were and we're only a couple minutes away. Now I'm sure they each or collectively bought him some great gift, but maybe try taking the time to acknowledge the guy on his day and preferably not just when it's convenient for you. My wife has mentioned it before and it just lead to an issue. I don't know, but if you have this great father, act like you don't take him for granted. I guess unless you have a bad father, you can't identify the really good ones. Just sad that my wife, my son and I have no actual blood connection whatsoever, but we appreciate this man like he was our own. All while being worried someday one of his daughters kids don't try to tell my son that Clyde isn't his "real"

Poppop. It's just bullshit

VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
chef:
Also, I like that my husband is not here.   I don't keep any of this a secret exactly, but I like it to be mine.  
Jun 20, 2016
user8992:
I hear you on the username and ability to vent without repercussion. Sorry to hear about the wife penalizing you. I'm guessing she feels insecure or inadequate at times hence why it hurt her to find out you felt that way. Funny thing you would think she'd try to make it better and not worse. My dad sucked and still sucks too. Took a long time to embrace and move forward but it's hard and I didn't have any male role model. My exhusband I guess assumed the role. Not intentionally. We were together for 14 years. I'm grateful for the relationship even though it didn't work out. I'm sorry as well about the in-laws. Hopefully one day they will appreciate him. Sounds like he is wonderful,  your son doesn't need blood relation nor do you to be part of the family. My best family have been a select few not related but there for me and have loved me more fierce than my own. Happy you have somewhere to vent. Wishing you a wonderful day. Big hugs. 
Jun 20, 2016

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