In the interest of the not so attentive internet, I suppose it would be traditional to release a New Years blog of some type. I don't write often or well enough to evolve a good fan base, so I ask myself why try? They're not reading it anyway. But everyone seems to use the excuse of: well, it's for me not them. Then why post it on the internet? It's simply and most usually an exercise in selfish pouting and attention hording. With everyone trying to notice themselves, it seems no one really does. Sigh. Whatever.
I really haven't put a lot of thought into a New Year Resolution. In fact, the passing year goes by without much discern. This past year had various shifts and unexpected turns, but nothing I know to regret. My only remorse comes from constant nagging to be something great, do something worthy with this life of mine. It's settled into a type of companion voice, egging me on, beating me up. It's stupid and crazy, but I dislike the frightening lack of ambition of those around me, and I feel guilty when I'm not productive. Even if it may seem far away, life has an expiration date.
Perhaps I'll mention some the highlights of the year. I turned 19, but flipping an age happens every year. Quit that awful horrid job at T-Mobile and learned that I'm really not very good with stress, even with my misguided image that I'm a "strong" "big" girl. Although, I did make enough money to peruse something interesting. With my heavy purse, I bought a bright pretty ticket to a floral trade school. I rather enjoyed being in school again, being challenged and expanding my brain again. Alas, it was only a brief five weeks and hanging out with ladies three times my age was a little trying. I then put my new skills to use at In Bloom, made friends, and had a generally pleasant time. Some of my happiest days, it was wonderful. I had a thoughtful caring boss (don't get me wrong, she utilized every moment to work hard), and I was challenged and was able to work with my hands. Unfortunately, it was killed by the move.
I don't regret moving to Austin in the least. I've been dying to get out of New Mexico, burn the little strings that kept me there. If I had stayed at In Bloom much longer, I probably would have never left. Also, it was clever coincidence that I had visited Austin with my sister before I started at In Bloom, only to find out that I was moving there a few months later. To note, the vacation to Austin was an incredible experience, and I did more then than what I have done since I moved to Austin. Moving here is hopefully in the best interest of the begging of the rest of my life. What influences me to decide what I'm doing will inevitably come from these particular surroundings and the people found here. I hope for more promise in the coming years.
As a whole, this past year I've hardly worked at all. I've spent a great deal of time lounging and playing. It's in my personality to usually punish myself for not being productive, but I have found that the free time generously given to me was spent well and in the pursuit of bettering myself and enjoying myself. Much of my childhood was skipped and set aside. As everyone else around me my own age pleasantly wasted time being a kid, I was functioning as an adult, having to survive and sort out my crazy life. So it is with happy gratefulness that I had the opportunity to simply exist for a while. I learned florist skills, crafty skills, improved a bit on my writing, read books, played games, and installed more healthy habits. I did the things I love to do: learning, making, and bettering myself. This was a good year.
Relationships are very much a part of life and no one can escape the influence of other people. Who you decide to surround yourself with will cause you to be similar. Simply stated, stupid people make you stupid. So, I am glad to have had two wonderful people with which I had countless wonderful experiences; my adorable Miss Bri Bri and my beautiful Miss Leslie. I can't stand that you're no longer a continuously everyday part of my life. I miss you greatly and no one will ever be able to fill your places. It's been a great difficulty moving on and anytime a potential friend appears, they pale in your shadow. I hope to stay bonded with you for hopefully a long time and look forward to seeing you more and again. Your absence has been painful.
I'm proud of my mother. Proud of my brother. Detached and completely apathetic toward my father.
There are a few others worth mentioning, Gunn, Dave, and Toaster. But this is getting long, and I'm shy of complimenting too much, and wouldn't be sure of what I was saying.
It has been a good year after all. I've found myself to be happy and finally happy with the one I'm with, even though I insist I don't look for happiness in life, but the experience of life, as a complete spectrum. Doubtless to say, there have been certain challenges concerning my love life, but that part is too personal, even for the internet.
For the coming year, I will fail to form a list of things to say I'll do, instead, when I think of them I will do them. I'm still unbearably nave, so I really only wish to form meaningful experiences.
Best wishes for everyone this coming year. If you read all the way down here, thank you for listening to my bout of selfish pouting and attention hording. Thank you 2007.
The Wuggly Ump
"Let's Eat Cake" by Brandi Milne
I really haven't put a lot of thought into a New Year Resolution. In fact, the passing year goes by without much discern. This past year had various shifts and unexpected turns, but nothing I know to regret. My only remorse comes from constant nagging to be something great, do something worthy with this life of mine. It's settled into a type of companion voice, egging me on, beating me up. It's stupid and crazy, but I dislike the frightening lack of ambition of those around me, and I feel guilty when I'm not productive. Even if it may seem far away, life has an expiration date.
Perhaps I'll mention some the highlights of the year. I turned 19, but flipping an age happens every year. Quit that awful horrid job at T-Mobile and learned that I'm really not very good with stress, even with my misguided image that I'm a "strong" "big" girl. Although, I did make enough money to peruse something interesting. With my heavy purse, I bought a bright pretty ticket to a floral trade school. I rather enjoyed being in school again, being challenged and expanding my brain again. Alas, it was only a brief five weeks and hanging out with ladies three times my age was a little trying. I then put my new skills to use at In Bloom, made friends, and had a generally pleasant time. Some of my happiest days, it was wonderful. I had a thoughtful caring boss (don't get me wrong, she utilized every moment to work hard), and I was challenged and was able to work with my hands. Unfortunately, it was killed by the move.
I don't regret moving to Austin in the least. I've been dying to get out of New Mexico, burn the little strings that kept me there. If I had stayed at In Bloom much longer, I probably would have never left. Also, it was clever coincidence that I had visited Austin with my sister before I started at In Bloom, only to find out that I was moving there a few months later. To note, the vacation to Austin was an incredible experience, and I did more then than what I have done since I moved to Austin. Moving here is hopefully in the best interest of the begging of the rest of my life. What influences me to decide what I'm doing will inevitably come from these particular surroundings and the people found here. I hope for more promise in the coming years.
As a whole, this past year I've hardly worked at all. I've spent a great deal of time lounging and playing. It's in my personality to usually punish myself for not being productive, but I have found that the free time generously given to me was spent well and in the pursuit of bettering myself and enjoying myself. Much of my childhood was skipped and set aside. As everyone else around me my own age pleasantly wasted time being a kid, I was functioning as an adult, having to survive and sort out my crazy life. So it is with happy gratefulness that I had the opportunity to simply exist for a while. I learned florist skills, crafty skills, improved a bit on my writing, read books, played games, and installed more healthy habits. I did the things I love to do: learning, making, and bettering myself. This was a good year.
Relationships are very much a part of life and no one can escape the influence of other people. Who you decide to surround yourself with will cause you to be similar. Simply stated, stupid people make you stupid. So, I am glad to have had two wonderful people with which I had countless wonderful experiences; my adorable Miss Bri Bri and my beautiful Miss Leslie. I can't stand that you're no longer a continuously everyday part of my life. I miss you greatly and no one will ever be able to fill your places. It's been a great difficulty moving on and anytime a potential friend appears, they pale in your shadow. I hope to stay bonded with you for hopefully a long time and look forward to seeing you more and again. Your absence has been painful.
I'm proud of my mother. Proud of my brother. Detached and completely apathetic toward my father.
There are a few others worth mentioning, Gunn, Dave, and Toaster. But this is getting long, and I'm shy of complimenting too much, and wouldn't be sure of what I was saying.
It has been a good year after all. I've found myself to be happy and finally happy with the one I'm with, even though I insist I don't look for happiness in life, but the experience of life, as a complete spectrum. Doubtless to say, there have been certain challenges concerning my love life, but that part is too personal, even for the internet.
For the coming year, I will fail to form a list of things to say I'll do, instead, when I think of them I will do them. I'm still unbearably nave, so I really only wish to form meaningful experiences.
Best wishes for everyone this coming year. If you read all the way down here, thank you for listening to my bout of selfish pouting and attention hording. Thank you 2007.
The Wuggly Ump
"Let's Eat Cake" by Brandi Milne