storm6436

Pain. Betrayal. These things I have in spades; I lost one friend last year over a woman I loved and now I've lost her, who never loved me at all.

Alone. Hollow.

That I've been here before is nothing new, but that realization doesn't lessen the sting of betrayal. Doesn't lessen the pain and agony of seeing that which I've denied for over a year;...
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I'm convinced that the last three days are the closet I've ever come with dying. I got some sort of flu, I guess... but let me put it in perspective, I don't get sick. Getting sick is maybe a once per year thing with me. When I do get sick, it's a 24 hour thing and then I'm done, bounce back and ready to go...
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Yet another new post, only this time with emo pity-party!


Not feeling to good about myself right now... an old girlfriend (time-wise, not age) of mine called and wanted to hook up... had to tell her I had herpes. I got the reaction I've been fearing ever since I realized my relationship with Meghan was going to crash and burn.

Right now, all the "Hey,...
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New post! This time with 95% less drama.


Is it too much to ask that people be able to do their jobs? I've been bouncing around various helpdesks trying to get an issue fixed at work, seeing as I'm on-call this weekend.

Throw in some "Sorry I can't tell you, that's classified and I'm on an open line" and it's like watching the goddamn keystone...
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One "friend" finally admits she knew about it. Evidentally Meghan has a big mouth when she drinks, so I guess everyone in that social circle knew and didn't have the balls to do the right thing and tell me, especially after they saw how much she meant to me.

I've had several people tell me I need to just cut them both off and move...
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Well, the drama storm is at full tilt... looks like I get to write off 4 people I previously thought I could trust. WTF, over?

Well, that drama I was talking about?

Yeah. Turns out I wasn't being paranoid after all. Meghan (my now *very* ex-girlfriend) confessed on Christmas Eve... she mispoke and stumbled talking about something and I drove a wedge into that hole... and out popped out the confession that she'd fucked my best friend and roommate from back when I was in college... while I was in...
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Ever had one of those fucked up situations where you wished you could talk to someone but couldn't due to the fact that the situation was a bit too fucked up and you didn't want it to get out?

Yeah. One of those days I guess. I'd post it here, but there's a few ppl in my social circle who lurk about... no need to...
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Hm. Life's moved on. I got a new job! Yay for more money! Well, that and I actually do shit now instead of sitting around feeling useless, which has been part of the cause of my unhappiness before Meghan left me.

As for her... *shrug* I have no fucking clue WTF is up. Stupid drama, stupid drama, more stupid drama... but I can't shake the...
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So the plot thickens... one part my me is screaming that I should drop this and move on... the part of me that loves puzzles, convoluted machievellian plots, and problems that can't be solved won't put it down. Yay for selective OCD.

Quick summary: Before I went to Japan, me and Meghan spent a weekend at a buddy of mine's cabin out the middle of...
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It's amazing how little something hurts when you think you're prepared for it... and how little time it takes for it to start hurting afterwards... I can't watch quite a few of my DVRed TV shows; I can't play WoW... So many things I shared with her and every reminder is another knife to the heart.

Bleh. I think I'm going emo.

Man, if 14 hours worth of jet-lag wasn't enough, I think this weekend alcohol bender finished me off. Christ I feel like shit.