snakeplissken

I'm gonna be gone awhile. The 1st I go back to Iowa for a visit through the 15th. I might pop on a bit, but not much more. I'm not looking forward to the trip. I'm flying United because it was cheap. I hate flying. I have to fly coach, so it's a real bastard for me. The biggest problem is I'm too tall for the rows, so I have to jam my legs in there or kind of off to the side. I try to get the aisle seats so I can take up some of the open area, but it's still an intense bitch. I'm hoping that I can sweet-talk the ticket agent and get an upgrade to Coach Plus, which has an extra six inches of legroom. It's so much better in those seats, my god.

The worst part of boarding the plane is walking past those fuckers in first class. Look at all that goddamn room. And it smells good, not like the greasy assholes I always end up next to. Smell like farts and Totinos pizza, they do. If I ever fly first class I'll go somewhere far, far away so I can enjoy that shit.