My mother was killed in an automobile accident this evening. How does this happen?
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Well, unfortunately, I had a bit of a relapse today. For whatever reason (I blame the rain), I could not stop thinking about my ex, and how much fun that she must be having in her new life. While I am stuck in the mud with mounting bills and no prospects.
I find that I am getting a bit more upset with her (or, rather,...
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I find that I am getting a bit more upset with her (or, rather,...
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realistic67:
relapses....I know it well. And I understand the wish to want her to hurt over all of this past. But, when I was in dealing mode over my break up my counselor put it like this. I'll bet she's probably having a shitty time of it. Because we are all human, life is a trial and it often sucks for all of us. A broken relationship is like a clavicle break. Even after it heals you still feel this ghost pain when it's bad weather outside.
She has to know how she's made you feel. She must be feeling awful and guilty ( mind you she might be really good at hiding it.) most days when she thinks about you. Everyone has regrets, its a common denominator.
Late at night, with that wine toast your freedom to try again with a better person, after the storm is over.
She has to know how she's made you feel. She must be feeling awful and guilty ( mind you she might be really good at hiding it.) most days when she thinks about you. Everyone has regrets, its a common denominator.
Late at night, with that wine toast your freedom to try again with a better person, after the storm is over.
simonkelly:
Thanks for the words, realistic. Good to hear an outside voice tell it like it is.
Divorce papers signed and delivered. One step closer to dancing again...
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simonkelly:
I can almost hear the beat now...
Thanks for the comments, all. Time will tell, I suppose. I just hope I don't get ahead of myself.
After such an unfortunate chapter in my life, I find myself in a position I never thought I would be in... I like a girl (I know, so fifth grade).
And maybe she likes me?
There is the problem. I have no idea how to read that lost language of woman.
So ladies, how do I know if I should persue this, or if I...
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And maybe she likes me?
There is the problem. I have no idea how to read that lost language of woman.
So ladies, how do I know if I should persue this, or if I...
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morbidkitten:
haha thats kind of a broad question because all girls are different. my advice is to get to know her hangout see how things go you will probably catch a vibe from her if shes into you and hey just going for the kill isnt a bad thing then you know..whats the worst that can happen? i know its gotta be tough being thrown into the whole dating scene again but hey have some fun with it maybe through it all you will find someone you can really love 
realistic67:
As a guy I think you should just trust your inner gut instinct on this. Yes, I know you probably feel that that part of you has let you down in the past. But, really it does take two to tango. Just remeber you've survived worse than not reading a woman well who you've just met. And, thease are better days Because your at least getting out there and moving on.
White wine regrets, the last drop reminding you of the absence in your life. The problem with the absence is, of course, that it has a direct object ( a contradiction for an absence)... and in the worst way, your mind is drawn back to her.
You hear stories from mutual friends of how much fun she is having, of how she has the carefree...
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You hear stories from mutual friends of how much fun she is having, of how she has the carefree...
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simonkelly:
Very true about the wine. Usually the third glass is the hardest... you start to remember the kind words, the sweet touches. As a rule, I down the third glass with all of the authority I can muster. And then the fourth bring... that special bliss!
And, love the new profile picture.
And, love the new profile picture.
realistic67:
A third person...?
That's the ticket. Get numb. As numb as you can and find dark the tunnel out to the other side.
That's the ticket. Get numb. As numb as you can and find dark the tunnel out to the other side.
Off to see Jeff Tweedy. Should be a good show.
And how about that wind last night, Eugene?
And how about that wind last night, Eugene?
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eta:
here in portland, i saw a small tree, roots and all, blowing down the street. it's windy here too.
simonkelly:
yeah, I have a nice 50' dead tree in my backyard. Horizontal. The scary thing is that the end is about 5' from my bedroom window.
Thanks for the encouragement from everyone, I really do appreciate it.
It has been somewhat difficult, this last week, slipping into a new life. One where comforts I thought I had secured vanished, and fears I had thought I had vanquished reappear. Such is the beat and strum of life, I suppose.
But, the divorce process is officially started. Though I have to pay for...
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It has been somewhat difficult, this last week, slipping into a new life. One where comforts I thought I had secured vanished, and fears I had thought I had vanquished reappear. Such is the beat and strum of life, I suppose.
But, the divorce process is officially started. Though I have to pay for...
Read More
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jennyfur:
i hope all goes well =) i cant say i know how you feel, so i wouldnt dare to. but hope it goes well
morbidkitten:
i hope everything works out for the best my dear
Oh, the joy.
Turns out, my estranged wife does not, at this time, have the funds to pay for a divorce. So I, who didn't expect it, didn't want it, and didn't ask for it, gets to pay for it. All in the name of moving on.
Eh, whatever.
Turns out, my estranged wife does not, at this time, have the funds to pay for a divorce. So I, who didn't expect it, didn't want it, and didn't ask for it, gets to pay for it. All in the name of moving on.
Eh, whatever.
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jennyfur:
i agree with realistic67
gwenyfver:
lucky you....
im sorry
i hope all works out...its just one big crappy situation isnt it...
im sorry
i hope all works out...its just one big crappy situation isnt it...
Hope is a rather curious phenomenon. When you don't need it, it is easily available, and comes with a natural grace. However, when you desperately need it, when, indeed, it is all that you need, it is as fleeting and elusive as shadows in the night. Catch a glimpse, step out of the light, and it is gone.
I cannot convince myself that I shall...
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I cannot convince myself that I shall...
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laceyk:
I am sure you are a nice guy and you are attractive. Just give yourself some room......
Let yourself breathe and once you have done that you will be ready.
Let yourself breathe and once you have done that you will be ready.
Perhaps I spoke just a moment too soon. Today brought the all-to- familiar fear and uncertainty back to my mind. The longing for what is gone and never to return. Some of the blame can be placed at the altar of the ever too eager american way of life, where barely after the breath of Christmas has passed we are already preparing for Valentine's Day......
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laceyk:
It will be okay, try not to think about it yet if possible. Because it is so far away.....
If you were closer I would make anti valentine plans with you!
If you were closer I would make anti valentine plans with you!
simonkelly:
You are very kind LaceyK. Yeah, sometimes it is better not to think.
Three days into the new year, and it has been infinitely better than the last. Only 362 to go.
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realistic67:
I'm loving it so far......
I'm loving it so far......
morbidkitten:
hope your luck continues 
Hang in there man, and stick close to family and friends. And we're all here for you if you need to just vent about how unfair life is.
Stay in contact...
I hope you are hanging in there ok.
*hugs*