sicpowered

everyday, you crawl into the night
A fallen angel, with your wings set alight
When you hit the ground
Everything turns to blue
I can't get through the smoke
That's surrounding you

I can see through the clouds
I can walk right through the walls
Hang me off the ceiling
But I can't take the fall
Should have crossed the river
But I may get...
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that would be 44 days and counting until i HAVE to be out of this abode, my stuff can stay, but i must be gone gone gone like the wind. the details are somewhat tedious and vaguely revealing. suffice to say in the ethics and the modern world dept. i oft find myself forging all new grey areas out of pure necessity.

time i guess...
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44 days and counting

my prone and curled form, wracked with cough and simple but maddening case of the sniffles.

but i vacuumed

cold, cold, i'm sweating sickness out from under the sheets, not a loving sight to be sure

but i balanced my checkbook

i'm deep in desire, in the bones of my earth, the streaks in my sky, only my own ragged voice to hear it all...
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have you ever seen a prize fight, wherein one boxer lands a brutal blow, the kind the annoucer winces at. and the guy just doesn't go down, doesn't drop, even to one knee, even though it's for the best to just get the hell out of there, call it a day, take the big L and a smaller ridiculous paycheck. and the other guy struts...
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merf, ugh, ... tuumptuummp. Thag sleepy, no see sun for many moon.

well, i've got some advice for you little buddy
Before you point your finger you should know that I'm the man,
and if I'm the man,
then you're the man,
and he's the man as well
so you can point that fuckin' finger up your ass

~~~

there i was, out and about on my errands, unknowing, unsuspecting. just putting tire (ire?) to road, foot...
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well, now. that little bout of melancholy seems to have abated. so i guess things are lookin up (haha, manic-depresso humour) so, still no details to tell, those sorts of things get somewhat tedious after i've run them through my head about 10 thousand times, but alas, i can't seem to stop myself, it must be fun in some way. I'll not subject you.

right,...
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lyrics in my head,

burn

and

you are
~~~

House is haunted
I just want to go for a ride
Out and on
Before I set this room alight
Left alone forever and for crimes unclear
With my patience gone
Someone take me far from here

Burning that gasoline

New day ywaning another day of solitaire
House is honest
Clearly more than I bear
Drag...
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need a change

email will be checked

it is what it is

later
e

i am a broken dinner plate, imitation china, oddly symmetrical pieces in silent immobile explosion from the center.

i am the bull, sightless and plodding, gentle and slow, and destructive.

tomorrow determines much for the immediate future.

will i do well?
will it be enough?
can i make my own space?
should i stay to do so?
how long til i go?
what stops me?
am i running?
how far?

~~~

when cats blink languidly at you, it's not as we think. they say i like you i love you, you are no threat. blink...
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