Okay, been a while since I've posted a blog; mostly because I really haven't had anything to say lately, but now I've got something on my mind that maybe someone can give me a bit of advice about. See here's the thing. I've never been very lucky with the ladies. In fact I've never had any luck at all. It's probably the fact that I'm shy, and have very little self esteem, and can't really talk to them except as a friend. So here's the thing; I met a woman on line about a year ago, and we hit it off. We have things in common and see the world in similar ways. She and I even went out a couple of times; Best dates EVER! At least the best I've ever had. On our first date we just sat and talked for seven and a half hours (good start I thought.) And she gave me a hug when it was time for her to go. The second was only about two hours, we spent walking around a museum talking; at the end of which she actually kissed me. (first one time that's ever happened for me.) So I thought we might be able to build some sort of relationship; didn't know or care what kind really, I just wanted to spend more time with her getting to know her and... Well just being with her. So we tried making plans to get together again, but here we are six months later, and it just hasn't seemed to work out. She and I texted each other a lot (pretty much every day.) in the beginning and they were pretty great. Then they seemed to lessen. They are still great texts that vary from light hearted and fun, to make my face red sexy. And even some serious heart to hearts from time to time, but she never seems to have time to see me. Or if we do make plans something comes up. Here's where I ask for thoughts. Taking in to account that she says she's attracted to me, and she wants to be with me, and we have exchanged naked pics (something that I still can't believe I did, but she said she liked them so....) ... You would think that there'd be no doubt in my mind that she likes me and wants to spend time with me, but.. There are lots little things that keep me from believing completely that's the case. She goes days and weeks without even a text hello, or a response to one of mine. We still haven't talked on the phone. I've called, but it only goes to voice mail. And we've only ever met at the date. (Okay that one I can understand.) She has told me she has trust issues due to things that have happened in her past, and that she was stalked once, So I can understand her being careful and wanting to make sure I'm not just putting on heirs with her. (which for the record, I'm not.) I've never been anyone but myslef. But I just don't get why it's taking so long for us to see each other again. I'm not trying to come off as obsessive, or needy, and I don't think I am with her: I'm just not sure if I really have a shot with her or if it's going to turn out that I'm fooling myself. So my question is; is it just my own self doubt about her actually being able to like me and find me attractive, making me imagine the worst; or does it seem to anyone else that she's just messing with me? What do you think? Oh and please keep in mind that this was hard for me to do, so if anyone thinks it'll be funny to add rude comments please don't. (not that anyone on here has been anything but cool so far, it's just in case...) Any way, I'd appreciate any real thoughts on this. Thanks
Ron. :-)