I think every day I am going to dedicate 10 minutes to stream of conscious writing. Not on here - don't want to scare anyone, but somewhere. I have an online blog, but I haven't started it yet. Maybe there... maybe in my journal. We shall see.
It is currently pouring outside. This does not excite me, only because I have to take the beasts...
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It is currently pouring outside. This does not excite me, only because I have to take the beasts...
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I am currently really enjoying this weekend. I am relaxing, sleeping in, hanging with the pups and grampa, wandering the farm, watching movie and NCIS... having me time.
I'm starting to not be as excited as i was about going to Cali... I think it's because it's the weekend before midterms. Maybe I will just wait and come out for my bday. Or a different...
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I'm starting to not be as excited as i was about going to Cali... I think it's because it's the weekend before midterms. Maybe I will just wait and come out for my bday. Or a different...
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bettybruises:
well i'm excited about you coming to california 
and you will be too, once it gets closer!
and you will be too, once it gets closer!
I am sad. I am in pain. I hurt in ways I didn't think was possible. There are moments when I am worried about the safety of my flesh.
Yesterday I went upstairs to his room, like I always do when I get to the farm and his bed was unmade and moved. Let's just say I practically collapsed on the floor in tears. I...
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Yesterday I went upstairs to his room, like I always do when I get to the farm and his bed was unmade and moved. Let's just say I practically collapsed on the floor in tears. I...
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VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
theconservative:
ouch...
i'm sorry.
i'm sorry.
ahnhell:
The pain of not having someone you love in corporeal form anymore is astounding isn't it? I completely understand. Even when you know they aren't gone. Even when they're so close you can still feel them and picture them in your mind perfectly. Touch is so important and that aspect, is gone. Tangible, is gone.
There's not much to say to comfort someone during these times but a friend of mine actually said something that helped me about 7 years ago when a very close friend died. I don't know if he came up with it or if its in a quote book somewhere.
"your suffering is testament to the greatness you once felt" I've never heard a saying more appropriate.
Love you baby. <3
Also, thank you
There's not much to say to comfort someone during these times but a friend of mine actually said something that helped me about 7 years ago when a very close friend died. I don't know if he came up with it or if its in a quote book somewhere.
"your suffering is testament to the greatness you once felt" I've never heard a saying more appropriate.
Love you baby. <3
Also, thank you
So apparently I am headed for a life of loneliness and misery... because I do not trust people. Well yes, I do not trust people after 10 days, especially those I meet on here. SORRY that I am a skeptic. But it just proves to me that some people can't hang. I am self-destructive I know that. I really don't appreciate being told I should...
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dpgc44:
I doubt that the guy is worth the heels or flats you walk in to do that. No worries, you will be in Cali soon where you will fall in love with the place again.
charbo:
Fox Mulder said it best when he stated "Trust No one".
Or actually it was something that Deepthroat said.
Or actually it was something that Deepthroat said.
I feel a really long rant coming on... or maybe more like stream of consciousness. But that will have to wait until I take my finals tomorrow. I have one for Fundamentals of Chinese Medicine and then I have a make up quiz (which is longer than the final) for Acupuncture Points 1. And I figure since the final is pretty much the same fucking...
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goatsofdoom:
:S
Good luck...
Oh, and I think you mean "sexting"
Good luck...
Oh, and I think you mean "sexting"
psylentmike:
Good luck on your finals tomorrow.
Try not to beat up on yourself too much. I don't think you're any crazier than the rest of us. All you do is take things one day at a time.
Try not to beat up on yourself too much. I don't think you're any crazier than the rest of us. All you do is take things one day at a time.
And today is the day I start to have mini breakdowns... Today is one of those days that makes you question everything. I really just want to pick up and go. Anybody have a job and a couch in San Diego I can have? I think this is just pushing me to get out of here by the end of the summer. A semester earlier...
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andsoitgoes:
Stabbing Westward is win man!
And I wish I could say I did. I'm sorry to hear about your uncle. To have someone that close to you not there... Well damn...
One thing I can say though, is that this could potentially make you so much stronger. That's the best way to think about it, focus on that and I think you're very likely to not only make it through, but become such a better person in the process.
You're in my thoughts!
And I wish I could say I did. I'm sorry to hear about your uncle. To have someone that close to you not there... Well damn...
One thing I can say though, is that this could potentially make you so much stronger. That's the best way to think about it, focus on that and I think you're very likely to not only make it through, but become such a better person in the process.
You're in my thoughts!
goatsofdoom:
You know, I actually like the Johnny Cash version of "Hurt" better. There's just something about his rough, almost spoken delivery...
All the best!
All the best!
they broke the mold when they made me. plain and fucking simple. and if you don't believe it then you don't deserve me in your life.
(how did you like my attempt at self-confidence?)
(how did you like my attempt at self-confidence?)
VIEW 11 of 11 COMMENTS
tireoghain:
If man meat makes you happy, imagine lard in a leather (or bright vinyl!) glove.
I'm sure there is some level of wacky in there somewhere.
And yes, yes chemical chance did break the mold
I'm sure there is some level of wacky in there somewhere.
And yes, yes chemical chance did break the mold
dpgc44:
Harley whomever is dissing on you is gonna get roundhoused by me! Have you ever been round housed by a fat asian? I dont think so.lol Make a trip to the bay.. or I might come down to hang out with my buddies if you want to come with? I am El Segundo which is right next to LAX
I always want to believe people when they say nice things to me. But it is hard. Very hard. I see ulterior motives and lies. Do I have trust issues? A whole lot of them. I have been hurt way too bad... everybody has but... I'm not gonna get into it.
I really enjoy when people I like say cute things that make me smile....
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I really enjoy when people I like say cute things that make me smile....
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violentpatriot:
damn you sinuses! 
Learning to take compliments is hard but so worth it!!
Learning to take compliments is hard but so worth it!!
tireoghain:
puppet master? Pull mah strings!
Too much time to think... AhnHell will understand most of this, well all of it. I have got to stop thinking.
Cancers...
Outwardly they can appear formidable - thick-skinned, unemotional, uncompromising, obstinately tenacious, purposeful, energetic, shrewd, intuitive and wise, sometimes with a philosophical profundity of thought verging on inspiration. Their intimates, however, may see a very different character, one with a sympathetic and kindly sensitivity...
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Cancers...
Outwardly they can appear formidable - thick-skinned, unemotional, uncompromising, obstinately tenacious, purposeful, energetic, shrewd, intuitive and wise, sometimes with a philosophical profundity of thought verging on inspiration. Their intimates, however, may see a very different character, one with a sympathetic and kindly sensitivity...
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goatsofdoom:
I'm not big into zodiac stuff, but yeah, a lot of that fits me...
What day in July?
What day in July?
barely:
It's not rape if I like it. (;
Love you, Harleygirl. <3
Love you, Harleygirl. <3
So... I was totally going to go to Toronto for the Canada East Gala but instead I have been convinced to go to the ink-n-iron festival. Damn you AbnrmlOne, I'm coming for your couch bitch!
So life has been sucky, we all know that... tunes that have been on repeat for the last 2 weeks::
essentially anything by Bayside has made some sort of...
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So life has been sucky, we all know that... tunes that have been on repeat for the last 2 weeks::
essentially anything by Bayside has made some sort of...
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barely:
So down. Sooo down. You know I love you, baby. Lemme prove it. Orally. ;D
jace:
We could have a make out session in the bubble bath, but we'd probably need a shower after to get clean. 
Where are my voice messages? <3
Where are my voice messages? <3Soooo ladies welcome my friend abnrmlone. Go and friend him and love on him a little bit. We dated back when I was 12... talk about fucking awkward. HAHAHAHA but no he's cool and pretty effing hot. And now has seen all of my most intimate parts.
Walked New York City today... feeling a bit better. Had an emotional breakdown last night but all...
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Walked New York City today... feeling a bit better. Had an emotional breakdown last night but all...
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jace:
Bahaha. I completely spaced and thought you meant in person.
I've seen those after all! <3
I've seen those after all!
<3
jace:
And yes, you need to send those to me.
I need a moment to rant. You can now pass this by cus there won't be any tits or vag so not interesting right? So tomorrow will be a month. Yes again about my Uncle. So the man did not have a will at the time of his death. Stupid given the degree of his disease that he knew and did not share with the...
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theconservative:
Well I'm happy if I was able to offer any insight. you're a cool cat, and I hate to see you going through this.
theconservative:
It's nice to empathize sometimes...
house cleaning is a good thing.
does that comment keep me on the list?
That farm looks delightful, but it also looks sticky. Not sure why.
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