La Cite Des enfants pardus
Why can't I talk to goth girls.....I have pallid skin, beached out hair. ( most of the time...) I wear black all the time.... Hell, I look like an Ingmar Bergman hero when I'm at my best. What's my problem? (fear, it's all fear, rejection et all....)
I'm terrible with girls names. I can't remember them to save my life. The very few that stick inside my pea brain tend to be the one's that corrispond to song titles or ones that I've had to repeat in my head endlessly for over a day so that the next time I run into her. I can at least not look like a fool on the most basic level.
It's the atmosphere in night clubs which gets me. I loved london Nightclubs. For they had the one thing that N.A. clubs don't have. A CHILL ROOM. A place away from the pounding beat where you could actually have a conversation without screaming in some ones ear.
(Now, I know that last things an excuse for my shyness in clubs but for christ sake would some of thease stupid club owners figure it out...????) If they'd put one in and made it other than a smoking room. Club owners are so in the last century.....Smoking is on the decrease all around the west coast yet they make thease damn quiet side rooms only for thease air polluters who supposedly drink more ( A total fallacy ) and not everyone else. I hate the idea of yelling at a woman I'm trying to meet.
Other than my lonelyness, Celebrities was kind of cool with Sanctuary being there instead of down in gastown. Gay clubs have a far more friendly atmosphere than straight bars any night of the week. Even without the gay community in force. It's the fact that the staff, bouncers and owners are gay and very laid back and tollerant that makes the place seem even homey.
It's the first time I've been in there since it reopened this last year. (after being closed for more than 5 years...) At least the guys washroom isn't like the nightmare experience it used to be years ago. Mind you, I'm older now and more connected with my self.
In the old celebrities they used to have this piss trough in the guys can with a long picture mirror hung above it so guys could check out other guys tackle. I remember going in there to releave myself years ago to find this setup. At the time I was working on RENT and we, the cast and crew were all gay club happy. Being as that's pretty much the theme of the musical and more than half the cast was gay it was the place to go, seeing as we all got in for free for being part of the show. But the mirror thing was far too much for me.
Here I was taking a leak with my new P.A. and I noticed I was getting stared at big time by all the gay men around me. This couldn't have been at the worst time cause I really had to piss but just the thought of thease guys staring at my dick and it's shiney acoutrament stopped any wish to piss. The moment was so bad I had to leave. Now, after many years it wouldn't have bothered me at all My Prince albert is as natural to me as my circumsision and my choice as well. But, way back when I was 29 and still hurting from the loss of who I thought was my true love? No way.
But seeing as I can't say even hi to a pretty girl in a night club to save my life. I still have far to go....
Why can't I talk to goth girls.....I have pallid skin, beached out hair. ( most of the time...) I wear black all the time.... Hell, I look like an Ingmar Bergman hero when I'm at my best. What's my problem? (fear, it's all fear, rejection et all....)
I'm terrible with girls names. I can't remember them to save my life. The very few that stick inside my pea brain tend to be the one's that corrispond to song titles or ones that I've had to repeat in my head endlessly for over a day so that the next time I run into her. I can at least not look like a fool on the most basic level.
It's the atmosphere in night clubs which gets me. I loved london Nightclubs. For they had the one thing that N.A. clubs don't have. A CHILL ROOM. A place away from the pounding beat where you could actually have a conversation without screaming in some ones ear.
(Now, I know that last things an excuse for my shyness in clubs but for christ sake would some of thease stupid club owners figure it out...????) If they'd put one in and made it other than a smoking room. Club owners are so in the last century.....Smoking is on the decrease all around the west coast yet they make thease damn quiet side rooms only for thease air polluters who supposedly drink more ( A total fallacy ) and not everyone else. I hate the idea of yelling at a woman I'm trying to meet.
Other than my lonelyness, Celebrities was kind of cool with Sanctuary being there instead of down in gastown. Gay clubs have a far more friendly atmosphere than straight bars any night of the week. Even without the gay community in force. It's the fact that the staff, bouncers and owners are gay and very laid back and tollerant that makes the place seem even homey.
It's the first time I've been in there since it reopened this last year. (after being closed for more than 5 years...) At least the guys washroom isn't like the nightmare experience it used to be years ago. Mind you, I'm older now and more connected with my self.
In the old celebrities they used to have this piss trough in the guys can with a long picture mirror hung above it so guys could check out other guys tackle. I remember going in there to releave myself years ago to find this setup. At the time I was working on RENT and we, the cast and crew were all gay club happy. Being as that's pretty much the theme of the musical and more than half the cast was gay it was the place to go, seeing as we all got in for free for being part of the show. But the mirror thing was far too much for me.
Here I was taking a leak with my new P.A. and I noticed I was getting stared at big time by all the gay men around me. This couldn't have been at the worst time cause I really had to piss but just the thought of thease guys staring at my dick and it's shiney acoutrament stopped any wish to piss. The moment was so bad I had to leave. Now, after many years it wouldn't have bothered me at all My Prince albert is as natural to me as my circumsision and my choice as well. But, way back when I was 29 and still hurting from the loss of who I thought was my true love? No way.
But seeing as I can't say even hi to a pretty girl in a night club to save my life. I still have far to go....
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
Im crap with names too, even have a problem with friends and relatives, but an old trick is to say the name 3 times in conversation with people as you meet them. sometimes this really works well at burning that name into your head, you have to actually say it- not think the name.
i guess weather it works or not depends on the amount of beers you've had!
So you work in theatre, worked a fair bit in that myself, never full time though. dance is one of the more fun things to light for and opp.
In recent years i have done a few stints at the Edinburgh festival- a challenging experience!