OH god....they hated me before this. At what point did my swinging bachlor pad degenerate into this den of deboachary? Vile acts of despresation depression coupled with urge to make horrible decisions. THe worst part about this now my friends mom knows...and hates me. My friends mom is like mom number 2 minus the whole being raised by lesbians. Oh god oh god oh god...
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Hehh fuck this no contact tihng. I'm locking both my doors so you have no choice but to come in and say hi. I won't tell if you won't!! I'd ask you bring eve but she'd narc on us. I miss her so much. If this thing blows over and i don't end up with a 3 to 5 years and 10000$ fine and they...
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Man i've been reading over what i've written over the past couple days on here....god damn am i ever at all time new low. I get more pathetic by the hour. This isn't helping. I write on a journal which i keep for myself on word. Than i quicky update this journal with brife flashes of my life for what purpose...attention! A part of me...
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littlepinkstar:
He's been around when you have not. Don't worry. hes afraid of eve anyways. Trying to get you off on a misdemeanor. testifying in court. it will get figured out. Your stuff will end up in your truck some day soon. She misses you, you know...
I hope shes happy. She needs to be happy right now. Considering all i put her through. It makes my stomach sick to think that she could wake up next to someone and feel complete. To think that little girl memories of me will be replaced with the fact i abused her. I have my trial this mourning. the boys aren't talking to me. Sarah...
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Well what do you do when your friends stop talking to? You bus them in from out of state. Considering all thats happend resently I just need someone to talk to. The one person in this state who is speaking to me (why i still have no clue) i don't want to speak to. The only person i can think of would lose her baby...
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Riding the c train to burnout vile
Well...at least i'm an honest slimeball
Last night was...interesting????OH god i'm so confused
Well the legal system has taken 4 hours of time again only to tell me to return at a later date.
Which reminds me...theres a slight chance i can get the communication barrier lifted. But if I did that would it be in vain?????
Going down to K-town after work...shower pending.
Which reminds me...theres a slight chance i can get the communication barrier lifted. But if I did that would it be in vain?????
Going down to K-town after work...shower pending.
In light of all the things that have happend i ask myself one question. why is it now when it doesn't matter i'm remembering to put the seat down?
Wish me luck cause i'm gonna need it
Wish me luck cause i'm gonna need it
Fact: I am missed
Fact: Feelings for me (however dimished) are still there none the less
Fact: No one is to blame for this but myself
Fact: Nothing is forever
Fact: I can't make contact with her or they take the kid away
Fact: Even if things legally turn out in my favor and my right to see her is re-instated theres no garentee things...
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Fact: Feelings for me (however dimished) are still there none the less
Fact: No one is to blame for this but myself
Fact: Nothing is forever
Fact: I can't make contact with her or they take the kid away
Fact: Even if things legally turn out in my favor and my right to see her is re-instated theres no garentee things...
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Man yesterday i was all gung-ho about fighting this thing. If i can get certain actions repealled i could try and fix things. But this mourning i wake up and i realize somethings are better off left untouched by hand. In my heart i know what will happen...i'm just so surprised those two can't see it yet there perfect for each other. So i know...
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