polyhistor

So i made a vow to myself.

I made a vow to go aginst the fundamental basis of male sexuaility and attitude. I am actively choosing to avoid beautiful women. For as long as we have existed men have been slaves to our eyes, to a figure with which we deem sexuaily pleasing and good to us.

My best and closest friend has already made that step, and in some ways I evny him; he has always been like that. Physical beauty means nothing to him; the character of the person he is with that matters to him. Many men fool themselves into that trance "Baby, ill never leave or cheat on you for someone more beautiful" or "I really do care about who a woman is but not what she looks like" but all too often they fail.

So i am working to fix myself, to break the mold of looking at the outside and to look within; and to do this i am avoiding pretty girls and only talking to what our soceity deems as "ugly" girls. I am tried this for a little and its difficult at times, especially trying to find an attraction in them, but the greatest endevors begin with the smallest step.

Perhaps all of this is wrong, but it is worth a shot.

-Torie Patterson