No rest for the wicked --- godsmack
Its been so fucking long since i felt anything towards life. Living life as one big thought doesnt leave much for heart. I shut my emotions off a long while ago. Now i have let myself feel again. Every single song. Movie. Social encounter. Thought process. Every move i make has a feeling connected with it. It is hard to stay focus but some how with this unbelievable channle of feelings i now can use again, i must act on my life. I have real thing in front if me. Yet, i still must wait for the real Her.
One may think i am asking for help when expressing myself. Help is nice, if it's on point. Otherwise, i will figure shit out. I am moving to be more productive. Toward a car and my own space. On the mean time. I am improving my person. For a lot of the feelings abiut my past are not good. So i learned to see everything as one energy.
One energy with many different parts. As a whole the energy has a basic way of being. Coming and going, often times storing or building, always moving some how. Separately it is very different.
