oldham

FUCK OFF, i'm so sick of this, she's not coming back, she's not worth this, i don't give a fuck, and what am i doing writing this on some website? For what? Because some trick ass other one can come and shit down my throat again? Again? Here's the thing, i got what, less than a week to figure this out and act like everythings cool and i don't care, and i'm all better, and i understand, oh jeezus, i'm so understanding, and i get it, it wasn't your fault, you didn't mean it, you think about me everyday, so on, so forth--this is what you get, right? You get kicked in the teeth for what?

this is your fault you idiot

(don't beat up on yourself)

shove that treatment center pop pyschology talk in your ass. this is your fault, you know it. You knew what she was when it started.

She didn't want to do this anyway. she gave up a long time ago, this was not going anywhere, you don't want to go back to the way college was, screwing anything and everything.

i still miss her though, the way she smelled and giggled at nothing, the pulling on my shirt, the way she cried, her awful taste in music and her inability to let anything go.

Then go back--but it's not the way you think it was.

SHU
who cares manit'sdone.
notthatbigofadealnotthatbigofadealnothimisssher for citreated her good i did i looked out i was there and i had a life once what happened to me? what happened i'm gonna puke