I'm shaken. I'm shaking. I think I may have made the stupidest mistake of my life so far. I fucked up big time. BIG FUCKING TIME.
In med school, during the first year, it's pass or fail. No worries then right? Just pass, no need to over achieve, because it's just P or F. So, my mistake was taking it too easy over the year. I did other things in addition to med school. In the fall, I worked to part time jobs and had a relationship that headed south. I devoted too much time and heart into those things. I failed anatomy. People said, don't worry, they'll just make you retake the exam in the summer.
You'd think I would have woken up and learned a lesson. Perhaps a normal person would have. Not me.
I bounced back in winter quarter and passed everything.
Then spring quarter started and the pressure diminished because it was known as the easy quarter. And I started off taking it easy during the first 3 weeks. BAD MISTAKE. And I started to goof around with suicide girls, downloading music, and a new relationship, though long distance. She came a visited me a couple of times and that was it.
Well, I failed neuro. FUCK. Then the student progress committee met yesterday to discuss my case and I just learned that they have recommended that I be dismissed from medical school because my overall performance for the year has been less than satisfactory. FUCK. FUCK. FUCK.
THATS ALL I CAN THINK AT THE MOMENT.
Fuck.
I'm so fucking pissed at my own stupidity, yet ironically, not as pissed as I can be. I'm pissed, but rational. Level headed for once. But, fucking pissed. PISSED AT MYSELF. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Shit, damn, piss, sonuvabitch. Fucking A. Damn.
ugh! UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
When will I learn? Is it too late? Of course not. But, shit.
So, I'm going to appeal if I can. Learn from this. Do what I can and accept what I cannot. Onward and forward. But for now, I'm fucking pissed as hell. It's my own fault and no one elses.
For the record: I love you all and wish you the best.
peace, joy and love
In med school, during the first year, it's pass or fail. No worries then right? Just pass, no need to over achieve, because it's just P or F. So, my mistake was taking it too easy over the year. I did other things in addition to med school. In the fall, I worked to part time jobs and had a relationship that headed south. I devoted too much time and heart into those things. I failed anatomy. People said, don't worry, they'll just make you retake the exam in the summer.
You'd think I would have woken up and learned a lesson. Perhaps a normal person would have. Not me.
I bounced back in winter quarter and passed everything.
Then spring quarter started and the pressure diminished because it was known as the easy quarter. And I started off taking it easy during the first 3 weeks. BAD MISTAKE. And I started to goof around with suicide girls, downloading music, and a new relationship, though long distance. She came a visited me a couple of times and that was it.
Well, I failed neuro. FUCK. Then the student progress committee met yesterday to discuss my case and I just learned that they have recommended that I be dismissed from medical school because my overall performance for the year has been less than satisfactory. FUCK. FUCK. FUCK.
THATS ALL I CAN THINK AT THE MOMENT.
Fuck.
I'm so fucking pissed at my own stupidity, yet ironically, not as pissed as I can be. I'm pissed, but rational. Level headed for once. But, fucking pissed. PISSED AT MYSELF. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Shit, damn, piss, sonuvabitch. Fucking A. Damn.
ugh! UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
When will I learn? Is it too late? Of course not. But, shit.
So, I'm going to appeal if I can. Learn from this. Do what I can and accept what I cannot. Onward and forward. But for now, I'm fucking pissed as hell. It's my own fault and no one elses.
For the record: I love you all and wish you the best.
peace, joy and love
VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
hey thanks a lot for wishing me a happy birthday. i havent talked to you in a while... or uh.. typed to you i guess
im sorry about the exams thing. art is SO much easier
i have cancer so i've been studying it alot and found out that there's so much chemicals that are out there still when people know they give people cancer...