melaniefromcharn

it's finally time... time for a job. broke. i got real twisted up about life and my new drug-addled way of living it about three weeks ago, and vowed solid to cool down and start writing/playing guitar in the evenings instead of getting stoned. So then, i set out with the confident mindset that i was taking less drugs, and due to that confidence proceeded to take all the more. But, at least, i have easily cut down on cigarettes and care little for alchohol. Discovering phsychedelics was the best thing i ever did. All that you hear from artists about drugs giving enlightenment and creativity is TRUE! your little mind gets it's usual chemicals, emotions, and senses mixed up, and then your Reasoning realizes, "hello, the world is so much more than my subjective tragedies and petty purposes, reality is true, but my perception of it can be manipulated, so why not find beauty through it? why be trapped by our (lack of) seratonin, or by our paranoid social awarness?" then you have true life-changing philisophical breakthroughs, or create moving pictures of birds and carnivourous flowers in your minds's eye.
even so, it's time to start writing again and spend my cash on more important weekend-only drugs. job search begins on Monday, today is devoted to anthropology ( rediculous and relative bullshit, forcing evolution down my throught. so doesn't ape-to-man theory demand a fossil record? where is it? WHERE?)