Where to start where to start.... i am a bundle of energy most days now. I am excited that i will be meeting my best friend in... what is it now? 37 days i think? Or maybe it's 36. eitehr way i have never had a best friend like this. Someoen i can talk to without having to worry about what they're going to think or feeling like i have to impress them. And the thought of getting to spend the weekend hanging out with him and some of our other friends is so exciting. It's been over 6 months since i got to hang out with more then one person i would call a good friend. And even then it was just akward and strange.
(Spoilered for little rant about former best friends)
So it will be fun to be able to get away from home with my friend and not have to worry about being impressive. Pretty maybe... cause he's kinda cute 
but not impressive. I wrote this blog because i feel like i have this little burning ball of energy in my chest... and every day that goes by and the closer to my trip it gets it burns a little briigter. I've started getting those moments while im out doing soemthing that i just grin like a maniac haha. Or out of nowhere go "Holy shit i get to meet my best friend in a little over a month.....*
Which brings me to the point of this blog:
I guess looking back on it it's kind of weird.To be best friends before meeting... it makes the meeting that much more... odd i guess is the word. If you spend almost every day chatting with someone, or calling them, or even just hanging out on video cam making faces at each other... should you be nervous about meeting them for the first time? I mean it's just like being best frineds with someone in real life right? Except when you see each other for the first time that day you can't hug.... so is there a reason to be feeling nervous? I can't come up with one damn reason why i am nervous to meet InnocentSid or a way to explain why i feel like i might be a disappointment when i get there. But i am and i do worry about that.
It's funny how these kind of things go. I know im going to have a blast with everyone down in philly but i know i going to be a huge bundle of nerves stepping off hte airplane and walking out to meet him. And the funniest part is... my mom is so sure he's a rapist. Well my mom thinks everyone is a rapist online. You reading this? In my moms eyes you're a rapist. Anyways so my mom demanded that immediately after meeting him i call her and tell her if he touched me inappropriately or unwanted. How do you explain to your 54 year old mother that if your hot older man best friend grabbed your ass and demanded you get in teh car right away it would be an ordinary thing for you. Or a welcome thing. haha. I think that is an explaination my mom can wait for haha.
PS: I feel so much better typing that out lol.
