lily

(Secret message to that fat kid in the suburbs that watches tv incessantly, um your so original, and i thought it would be funny to piss on your toothbrush, um and watch where you step i think i dropped a few things that may stick into you and give you bloodbourne diseases. uck!)

still here.
lost so many things.
I remember your eyes last night.
so dead as you turned away from me and got in the devils car.
I felt it like cancer, spreading and in my mind that car crashed and you all died even the little baby. Mommys blood all over you. just a vision that you'll tell all your friends.
a few days, and...
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I'm going south, tomorrow i think.
Cause i've been nodding out too much in detroit and my lungs and throat are sore.
i'll miss this rainy city.
I'm tottally broke, your money can go real quick when theres drug dealers on every block. "what you need girl?"
a whole lot more that what you have up your ass mister.
Real tired. You can hear lots...
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I hate everything about you, fatherfucker.
stuck here, in this wasteland cause i can't fucking drive my van and its cold.
i've been working at the most horrible fucking strip club. its so sleazy and depressing. I've been traveling with this kid, that is such a fucking asshole. i hate him so much, but its hard to seperate. so frusturating, i want to be alone...
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I made it all the way to Detroit, and i fucking love this Abandoned city. The sky gets so grey here and foggy that you feel like you are walking in clouds down the street and half the houses here are abandoned, all boarded up and ready to be broken into. And all the drug dealers pile up in the middle of the street and...
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In pittsburgh pa.
I smell bad.
Love, Lily

still got these headaches. maybe its not hypochondria. i'm gonna be an old shopping cart lady in some random city collecting your garbage and still getting these strange premonitions. it was strange to walk out of the hospital and see light again. it was like i got institutionalized at the hospital, the smell of sickness lingering in the hallways. people who have walked this planet...
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in the hospital.
this nice nurse let me use her laptop.
menengitis, fuck cunt.
i feel like i'm dying.
much love, lily

headed south soon
so fucking cold
leaves fall
like all of you
couldn't find my friend in nyc
just wet rats under my toes
and poison in my blood
so afraid of dying
need to talk to that girl
so she can remind me we are just cells
floating.
Love, Lily

I need to leave this country.
Love, Lily

Richard took a bunch more pictures before i left.
we went down to east river park for this project he is working on.
I left the city last night. watched the city lights fade behind me and secretly wished death upon 3.6 million people.............
One of my old friends was there, sleeping in east river park. we drank alot of beer together and talked shit....
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