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You can blame absolutely everything on your parents. It's either genetics, or how they raised you.

I wouldn't ever want lesbian parents. I'm not homophobic. I just don't want to get stuck in an endless loop of "Go ask your mother."

someday I will disappoint and confuse a burglar who'll find my drawer full of Taco Bell sauce packets

chefdaddy:
We used to have a little basket full of Chinese sauce packets and ketchups in our kitchen. If I remember correctly when we got our house broken into they just threw it in the floor with everything else. No respect for strong pc game. On a more serious note, if the cops ever raided your house I'm sure they would call the hasmat team out to dispose of the whole drawer. That is enough hot sauce to fill a super soaker and do some serious damage. I've seen what it can do to a penny imagine what it could do to a car
caraphernelia:
hahaha

I hate waiting in lines. Just hurry up and pick a suspect already

Ironically "Chumbawamba" totally got knocked down and never got up again.

Caterpillars have it made. They eat a lot, go to sleep, then wake up beautiful.

caraphernelia:
aww :3

If the chemical symbol for water is H2O... is the chemical symbol for holy water H2Omg?

Looks like my get rich painfully slow scheme isn't working either

rambo:
hahahaha join the club

any guy can tell her she's beautiful. Be the guy that shows her she's beautiful

and on the 7th day while God was resting Satan created the Kardashians

It's taken me awhile, but I think I'm finally ready to accept that it's not butter.

sayyo:
I still can not . It has to be butterĀ 
kjj0013:
But it's not! Damnit!

I guess knife throwing isn't one of those "learn by doing" kinda things. I might be going to jail guys