kennyg

"Give me the position with the least possible responsibility."

I feel like a broken person. I am capable of being responsible, I just don't want to be. I don't care any more that there is a world full of responsible people around me. I've spent most of my life caring about other people, and now I start to take care of myself and thinking about what I need. And what I need is a break!

I've been having thinking that family just isn't worth the trouble sometimes. But I still try to please people so I say I'll go to a family dinner even though it feels like a chore. Then I change my plans and notify them late, get in trouble, and it reassures me that it wasn't worth saying I'd do it in the first place.

What the fuck is it with the holidays? My brother thinks I'm depressed, but I'm better off than I've been in years. It's just the day job and family that get me down.

I don't like posting bummers, but this is some shit I had to get out. And even then, I'm not very good at articulating it. Hopefully I'll paint this spot over soon.