jnthn

I have some crushes...it's okay, it's just the alcohol...

I come to see you. you are just off work. we hang and talk. he's jealous of everyone. I just don't care anymore. you tell me about stabbing yourself, you tell me about your habit, how hard it is now to stay away. you tell me your roommate wants to fuck me despite her boyfriend you order me Patron. You do it again. you've got an ash on your face. out of character I don't tell you. we go to the other bar. we drink cider. you take your pants off in front of all of us. you are embarassed instantly. we go upstairs. we hang for a minute. you think I'm hitting on you, but I'm not. I don't know what to do with you, personalized license plate says UR-A-MESS. We smoke reggae records. I drive you home. We watch conan and share some music. you are fucked with your pills. but that record WAS great. you hug me, tell me I smell good, but that's as far as you want to go. whatever. I'm past worrying about the friend/not-friend barrier. I just wanna make sure you don't kill yourself tonight. you're ok, I guess. I leave, you hug me bye, for a second too long, and say: that's as far as I'll go. I think you want more, but it's too late for that.
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You are the only bionic person I know. I have 3 ciders in me now. I should be home sleeping. your heart is radio controlled and it's hott. You are cute. you are 120 miles away. I never noticed you but now I notice the way your eyes linger when I laugh at the bizarre shit you say.
I should be in bed.
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I should be in bed. Did you call me or did I call you? I'm totally into it. I'm getting fucked up and talking to you, we're getting fucked up together. Your brain at this moment is getting to me in the most sexy way. I don't want to say goodbye, but I know the alarm will go off while I'm still awake soon. Do you know you turn me on?
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I'm awake as soon as I fell asleep. Instantly reminded why I don't freelance anymore: you must absorb other people's stress. Hearing 3000 people singing "Get UP, Stand Up," is awe-inspiring, esp. when the conference is called "Kick Bush Out the Door in 2004!" and people are full of passion to remove the idiot and his dad and croneys from power.
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Do you know with your makeup smeared and that picture I like.... what is up? I will very possibly be in Amherst within 2 weeks. Does that mean anything to you?
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You are a spaceman. You are a site for sore eyes, dude. Tomorrow, we'll see what all the hype is about, but I just wanna see you doing what you're supposed to be doing and that's beating the shit out of the drums. We'll see if your friends are worth the millions and millions of excuses, too...tomorrow.
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