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jessikah

Brooklyn NYC

Hopeful Since 2005

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Friday Feb 25, 2011

Feb 25, 2011
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Last week my Grandmother started slurring her words and has started to get forgetful. We assumed baby stroke or Alzheimer.

Last December my Grandmother had surgery to remove an entire breast due to breast cancer. Chemo, surgery, radiation. She pulled through like a champ. She's always been strong as an ox stubborn and healthy. She has a very steady strong heart. Though this particular experience wasn't without a ton of fear.

Yesterday I got a call from Mom. Grandma had gone in for a cat scan to determine stroke or other. And was then and there admitted to the hospital because what they found was one tumor the size of a kiwi on her brain. And it's cancer. Also a second tumor on her brain that seems benign, so they have no interest in that one.

The next step with history of breast cancer so close they are scanning her entire body today to look for any other cancers in the body, because if there is and it's considerable their decision is to do nothing as nothing could be done and she would have at most 4 months.

Until they have this confirmed it determines the course of action. To either drain the fluid around the tumor that's pressing on her brain, surgically remove it or nothing.

She's being scanned for the body cancers today. After today they will analyze the tumor to know whether it is aggressive. And after all this we will then know for certain what can be done and how long we have.

Last year just before my Grandmothers surgery my Mom had t have an emergency hysterectomy. About a year before that I was diagnosed with cervical cancer. Over the course of the last 3 years the women of my family are being battered by our own bodies. And we are some of the happiest loving women, especially to each other.

There's not many people whom I'm okay talking to about this.

So,... that's what happened and that's essentially my mind, it's moving rather slowly.. like trying to soak up more time before the inevitable.

Naturally I want to be there. I WANT to be there. My Grandmother is the very foundation of our family. And she means the world.

A little sidenote. My Grandmother is mid to late 70's. My youngest Uncle has severe cerebral palsy. He can't walk, his tendents were severed behind his knees in the 70's as a way to lengthen them for him to stand. It went wrong and healed badly so he scoots around. His legs and feet have severely atrophied over time. He'snow in his mid 30's and suffers from grand maul seizures. Putting it nicely he has the mentality of a 3-4 year old and his communication is even less. He's prone to extreme hyperness and outbursts. He will bite himself, throw fits and gets very loud. He also has only use of one arm and hand, the other has permenantly been unmovable since infancy and remains crooked twisted and deformed. That being said he has the innocence of a baby. Mor awareness than can be explained and my Grandmother is his sole care taker. My GrandFathr passed about 6 years ago. There's a case worker that comes in to help with h im, the bath has lifts ect. So the concern is more than her it's them both. We can't avoid him watching her deteriorate. He'll know something is very wrong.

When we get more info my Mother is going to drive to st.louis from Texas. I will likely fly out. I don't jknow how long I will stay. It depends on the time legnth we're given. And that will determine whether I make a single long trip or two trips.

I've always been there through all of her hospitalizations. She'd have me crawl into the hospital bed with her and we would cuddle. She was so afraid then. I can't not be there.





VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
kod:
*hugs*
Mar 9, 2011
nanette:
hon how are you? hows the family? sending out best of wishes
Mar 17, 2011

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