Life goes up, then it goes down. Then back up... then back down.
I can't help but get the feeling that I'm stuck in a circle with no way to get out. I want change but for some reason, I'm scared shitless to change. I think I've began to settle into a pattern of acceptance for what things are RIGHT this moment. This isn't anything like I want it to be.
At the same time... I'm not upset with my life. I'm content. Which is both good and bad in my eyes.
Will I ever accomplish my goals? Do the things I tell myself I want to do? Do the things I've once told myself I was GOING to do, but still haven't? I have nothing to hate my life about.
Except my car. When I pay that thing off, I'm taking it into the desert and burning it. Maybe I'll make a party out of it.
I think the Arizona weather and atmosphere is starting to urk me. The people as well. Fuck me running the people that live here are ABSOLUTE idiots. I hate the fact that virtually everyone around me is a close-minded dipshit who care for nothing but money and their fake religions. So much judgement is passed in this.
Oh well. Maybe I need a change of scenery. I hear Portland isn't too bad...
I can't help but get the feeling that I'm stuck in a circle with no way to get out. I want change but for some reason, I'm scared shitless to change. I think I've began to settle into a pattern of acceptance for what things are RIGHT this moment. This isn't anything like I want it to be.
At the same time... I'm not upset with my life. I'm content. Which is both good and bad in my eyes.
Will I ever accomplish my goals? Do the things I tell myself I want to do? Do the things I've once told myself I was GOING to do, but still haven't? I have nothing to hate my life about.
Except my car. When I pay that thing off, I'm taking it into the desert and burning it. Maybe I'll make a party out of it.
I think the Arizona weather and atmosphere is starting to urk me. The people as well. Fuck me running the people that live here are ABSOLUTE idiots. I hate the fact that virtually everyone around me is a close-minded dipshit who care for nothing but money and their fake religions. So much judgement is passed in this.
Oh well. Maybe I need a change of scenery. I hear Portland isn't too bad...