Ok...so keep laughing...I went home yesterday...skipping the bar...to finally clean my crack den of an apartment...and start organizing for the packing I need to be doing.
Well, I made it home...and that's about all I can say for myself. I sat my ass on the couch and watched bad television until my sleeping pills kicked in. Very productive.
***
Today...has been something of a roller coaster.
I've been in a pretty good mood since hearing that not only is my sg set finally in the mail on it's way to me as we speak...but ALSO the creepy photographer dude I shot with at least two months ago, the one who wanted me to touch his dick, and I was sure had run off with my prints...FINALLY called!! He should be dropping my prints off either tonight or tomorrow!
Arriving at work...I read a comment in a journal that put me in my happy spiritual place...then went to run my Thursday group, which was fabulous! We talked about taking action towards our goals in life. How to break them down so they're actually attainable...rather than big and general and overwhelming...leading us (me) to sit on my couch in my filth, rather than taking care of business. I shared with them my being blocked to cleaning my house. They always love when I confess I'm human too, which I do all the time. They especially love when I allow my sailor-like vocabulary to run the show.
After group...I met with one of my clients...it was our last session
It's hard telling my clients I'm leaving. I feel like I'm abandoning them...and some of them...I am!
My supervisor wants to know what to do with my deaf clients. But there ISN'T anything to do with them. Throw them out on the street...this agency is equipped to deal with them. In fact, this agency which is supposed to exist to serve individuals with disabilities...isn't even accessible for it's clients under the Americans with Disabilities Act!
And this is where my day starts to slip down hill...
Dealing with my supervisor who is panicking...
Dealing with trying to get my stupid paperwork all finished...my cases all nicely sealed up...
Dealing with the hotline calls of deaf victims of domestic violence looking for 'services'...and I have no where to send them. I'm the only person in the five boroughs who specializes in such a thing...all the other mental health clinics have waiting lists...
Dealing with trying to not get so riled up by the things that have annoyed me the whole time I've been here...lack of supervision...lack of safety protocol...lack of supervision?
It's made me so frustrated that I decided to quit...sitting here and watching them flounder around makes me mental...but I'm now keeping my mouth shut...because if they want to have their faces shot off by some abuser at the door because they don't have the safety protocol I've been insisting they re-instate...that's their fucking problem!
I TRIED!!! I desperately tried to get this program into the shape it could have been...This was the job I'd wanted when I was still in school...to see it fall apart like this is heartbreaking...
But as you can see...I'm getting some pleasure out of leaving this place in the lurch. I feel bad for my clients...but I don't feel bad for this place. They treated me with absolutely no gratitude and no respect.
Now they can go screw.
***
My day now improves...as it's creeping ever so slowly towards five o'clock...at which time I'll creep towards to bar... Hope to see you all there!!!
Well, I made it home...and that's about all I can say for myself. I sat my ass on the couch and watched bad television until my sleeping pills kicked in. Very productive.
***
Today...has been something of a roller coaster.
I've been in a pretty good mood since hearing that not only is my sg set finally in the mail on it's way to me as we speak...but ALSO the creepy photographer dude I shot with at least two months ago, the one who wanted me to touch his dick, and I was sure had run off with my prints...FINALLY called!! He should be dropping my prints off either tonight or tomorrow!
Arriving at work...I read a comment in a journal that put me in my happy spiritual place...then went to run my Thursday group, which was fabulous! We talked about taking action towards our goals in life. How to break them down so they're actually attainable...rather than big and general and overwhelming...leading us (me) to sit on my couch in my filth, rather than taking care of business. I shared with them my being blocked to cleaning my house. They always love when I confess I'm human too, which I do all the time. They especially love when I allow my sailor-like vocabulary to run the show.
After group...I met with one of my clients...it was our last session
It's hard telling my clients I'm leaving. I feel like I'm abandoning them...and some of them...I am!
My supervisor wants to know what to do with my deaf clients. But there ISN'T anything to do with them. Throw them out on the street...this agency is equipped to deal with them. In fact, this agency which is supposed to exist to serve individuals with disabilities...isn't even accessible for it's clients under the Americans with Disabilities Act!
And this is where my day starts to slip down hill...
Dealing with my supervisor who is panicking...
Dealing with trying to get my stupid paperwork all finished...my cases all nicely sealed up...
Dealing with the hotline calls of deaf victims of domestic violence looking for 'services'...and I have no where to send them. I'm the only person in the five boroughs who specializes in such a thing...all the other mental health clinics have waiting lists...
Dealing with trying to not get so riled up by the things that have annoyed me the whole time I've been here...lack of supervision...lack of safety protocol...lack of supervision?
It's made me so frustrated that I decided to quit...sitting here and watching them flounder around makes me mental...but I'm now keeping my mouth shut...because if they want to have their faces shot off by some abuser at the door because they don't have the safety protocol I've been insisting they re-instate...that's their fucking problem!
I TRIED!!! I desperately tried to get this program into the shape it could have been...This was the job I'd wanted when I was still in school...to see it fall apart like this is heartbreaking...
But as you can see...I'm getting some pleasure out of leaving this place in the lurch. I feel bad for my clients...but I don't feel bad for this place. They treated me with absolutely no gratitude and no respect.
Now they can go screw.
***
My day now improves...as it's creeping ever so slowly towards five o'clock...at which time I'll creep towards to bar...
Hope to see you all there!!!VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
Screw your job. If they don't appreciate you, then they don't deserve you. You can ride your monster truck back and crash through the office, grinding down telephones and copy machines while people look one with horrific grins pasted to their faces.
Or you could just never go back.