sitting here, realizing that my sleep schedule is all kinds of messed up from working overnights. let's see, Thursday, I'm so exhausted from everything that I fall asleep shortly after Grey's Anatomy is done. I might sleep until 9 AM, 10 if I'm lucky, on Friday. the only problem is that I work 11:30 PM on Friday until 8 AM (or so) on Saturday. so I need sleep between that. so I end up going to sleep around 5 PM or so, and end up sleeping about 4 or 5 more hours.
Saturday, I'm tired out, and all, so I end up going to bed around 11 AM or noon, so I would (ideally) sleep until sometime between 7 PM and 9 PM. well, the last few weeks, I've been spontaneously waking up around 5 or so. so I do things for a while, then end up taking another nap. another overnight shift.
Sunday, I drive home and try to stay awake. yeah, that tired. I don't even try doing anything, since I sit there nodding off all the time. end up falling asleep around 10 AM, maybe 11 AM, and sleeping until about 3 PM or so. the day is shot. eat and such. but I want to get back to normal, so I go to bed around midnight or so.
you know, for a sleep schedule, this really sucks!
hmm, what else is in the news? my life here still sucks. I talk to more people on this website than I do in real life. basically I have no social life, and in all honesty, not sure if I have the means to build one. I'm too damn busy!
and in a few weeks, start up counseling again. as my one professor said "You have all the cognitive skills and knowledge you need. you have that. its the emotional piece that, once you get that, you'll be phenomenal."
so yeah, time to try and be honest and open, and see if this guy can break through those walls I have built up. walls that would put any prison to shame. walls built over a lifetime of being ignored, told that I'm not good enough or the effort I put forth isn't good enough or I could do better, and a lifetime fo being betrayed.
yeah, this should be fun! break through all the pain, let it out, deal with it....all on my own! no one here (in my life in Rochester) to talk to, listen to me, or even just be there for me as I break down and shake uncontrollably from all the pain inside. God I wish I had some musical talent, oh the songs I could write with all of this inside of me! or artistic talent, so I could get it out that way! just not sure if I have the words to write out what its like inside my head.
yeah, its going to suck!
so, how's everyone else's life out there?
and on a happier note, I just got "Players (Pledge of Allegiance)" on DVD. check it out. for no other reason that see a young Lennon in her acting debut....keep in mind, the movie was filmed (I think) about 5 years ago!
Saturday, I'm tired out, and all, so I end up going to bed around 11 AM or noon, so I would (ideally) sleep until sometime between 7 PM and 9 PM. well, the last few weeks, I've been spontaneously waking up around 5 or so. so I do things for a while, then end up taking another nap. another overnight shift.
Sunday, I drive home and try to stay awake. yeah, that tired. I don't even try doing anything, since I sit there nodding off all the time. end up falling asleep around 10 AM, maybe 11 AM, and sleeping until about 3 PM or so. the day is shot. eat and such. but I want to get back to normal, so I go to bed around midnight or so.
you know, for a sleep schedule, this really sucks!
hmm, what else is in the news? my life here still sucks. I talk to more people on this website than I do in real life. basically I have no social life, and in all honesty, not sure if I have the means to build one. I'm too damn busy!
and in a few weeks, start up counseling again. as my one professor said "You have all the cognitive skills and knowledge you need. you have that. its the emotional piece that, once you get that, you'll be phenomenal."
so yeah, time to try and be honest and open, and see if this guy can break through those walls I have built up. walls that would put any prison to shame. walls built over a lifetime of being ignored, told that I'm not good enough or the effort I put forth isn't good enough or I could do better, and a lifetime fo being betrayed.
yeah, this should be fun! break through all the pain, let it out, deal with it....all on my own! no one here (in my life in Rochester) to talk to, listen to me, or even just be there for me as I break down and shake uncontrollably from all the pain inside. God I wish I had some musical talent, oh the songs I could write with all of this inside of me! or artistic talent, so I could get it out that way! just not sure if I have the words to write out what its like inside my head.
yeah, its going to suck!
so, how's everyone else's life out there?
and on a happier note, I just got "Players (Pledge of Allegiance)" on DVD. check it out. for no other reason that see a young Lennon in her acting debut....keep in mind, the movie was filmed (I think) about 5 years ago!
panini:
hey. hope this week goes a bit better 
just think: 3 more days until greys anatomy! hahaha.. that's what i do at least. get a good night's rest!!!
just think: 3 more days until greys anatomy! hahaha.. that's what i do at least. get a good night's rest!!!