I live a sedentary lifestyle of no real consequence. In other words Iāve resigned myself to the gutter metaphysically speaking. In other words Iām a slacker... there I said it!
It feels like hard work even to get out of bed and some days I donāt. I can put this down to my illness, but how can I know myself and what Iām capable of doing if I donāt push myself? And if I donāt, how will I ever get better?
Iāve made attempts at breaking free over the seven years or so that Iāve been in this situation but I havenāt stuck to any of them, I always go back to where itās most comfortable/familiar. And so here I languish in my tomb.
Iāve made another plan, the hardest most difficult to date. Iām going to join a gym because Iāve put on some weight and go to an adult learning centre to wake my lazy brain up. Itās so debilitating to always be crowded by brain fog when you need to think on your feet and come up with solutions. I need to take action otherwise seven more years will pass and Iāll still be here wishing for a better, more tolerable life.
Has anybody got some words of encouragement? A pep talk is much needed as my spirits are pretty low after so much defeat!