gayballs

I went to get my stupid pills and when I was waiting for them to get them to me.
I was leaning on the counter.
And then I hear, from behind me, in spanish-- "have your pants ever fallen down?"
IAnd i look back, there's this fat old woman in a moomoo. or mumu. I have no clue how that's spelled.
With a walker, she's so fat.
Tattooed-on eyebrows.
And she's looking at me as though my wearing my pants low has totally offended her.
I smile.
I say "no, maybe on a late night drinking binge or whatever." I put my hand up like a bottle, thumb in mouth, and act like I'm drinking. I'm smiling at her.
All of this is in spanish.
I turn back to the counter to pay for my stupid pills.
Then I turn back to her again, smiling again, being friendly, again, and say "I've worn them this way since I was born."
And she gives me the angriest face ever and says
"quisiera caminar de tras de ti para BAJARTE LOS PANTALONES. No podrias hacer nada porque soy una vieja loca."

Which means "I'd like to walk around behind you and PULL YOUR PANTS DOWN. You couldn't do anything because I'm just a crazy old lady."

Then she said, angrily again, "I can forgive black people wearing their pants that way, since they have such big asses."
But not me, she meant.
Pure venom.
That's my story.