gayballs

Last night I reached new levels of drunk. Levels I'd never imagined.
When Hillary and I bought the waterproof mattress cover it was meant for the cats, not for me.

yes.



The event was sponsored by Bacardi.
It was at the South Beach Public Library and there were 25 restaurants and 50 authors there. There was a champagne table, a beer table, and two or three bacardi tables. All I could eat/drink.
I hung out with lovely people and a crazy mid-fortiesish Irish lesbian that kept saying "for fook's sake" and kept grabbing me. She was lovely too.



I wound up at a gay bar and some 45 year-old gay dude put an ascot on me. I groped and danced with Hillary and this 42 year old woman that kept telling me how sexy I am.
Then I stumbled around making cry faces and saying how much I hate myself and how I'm a pervert.

The way that she took care of me when I was in a stupor was really moving. I love my fucking girlfriend.
She brought me home and I sat in the bathtub and apologized for embarrassing her, only she wasn't embarrassed at all.
Then I passed out and wet the bed.
This afternoon we laughed about it. It made me happy.

It was a blast.
This morning's hangover was epic.