faithaloneidie

I am gonna delete all of my "lacking clothing" pics.

My boyfriend met a girl off the internet without telling me at 5 am. She is going through a divorce. And when I started freaking out, he acted like I was completely in the wrong. They had been chatting all night and decided to go get donuts. I don't trust her. What kills me was that earlier that night I asked him to come over to my house and give me a massage until I fell asleep, but he acted like I was just joking. And he wants to hang out with her again tonight. Ugh. But I told him no hanging out with her late at night and you have to tell me first. At first he acted like it was ridiculous, but then I think that he realized how much he hurt me and was kind and more understanding.

I cut. Man...it had been a while since I had done that.

He really wants to be "a part" of this site and of me and for some reason he really wants to see my fucking account. I want it all to just go away. I deleted all of my revealing pics because I thought about how its not exactly right. He said he doesn't care...but I care.

I didn't care then. I was going through a stage. A manic episode. I felt great and everything was goingg fine and I could do and get away with anything I wanted. I haven't seem the psychologist in a long time. Haha Over a month. I hate going to those places. But now I feel like shit. And my ear hurts. And my cheeks feel funny from the tears. I don't know how well I will do at work today. I can't take it if he ever leaves me! What if he secretly wants that girl more than me? What will I have then? I wish that my life didn't revolve around him. I wish that I didn't depend on him for happiness. I know that if I ever lost him, I would be lost as well.