daysofgrace13ben

Well tomorrow I am finally going out with that sweet, hot, redhead I mention as my current crush in my profile. I am already getting kind of a bit nervous. But then again almost everything makes me nervous these days. I just hope all goes well cos I really like this girl a lot and all my life i have managed to fuck things up...
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I am always so angry, but that is just an excuse for not being able to deal with a fucked up life.

I am so screwed up. Between all my mental issues, the drugs I take for them and all the drugs and drinking I have done in the past. I really do not know if I am really living or dreaming. I know I am living now but everything in my past feels like a dream obscured by a weird fog. I really can't tell you...
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Well I heard some cool cover songs today. I guess they had been out for a while but I really don't care all to much about new music, I'm still playing my Strat along with Zero and Today. However I must admit the Deftones did an awesome cover of Weezer"s Say I t Ain't So. They kept it pretty true to the original although I...
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I swear I have a big problem. There is this guy I work with and I swear he is worse than Jim Carrey in the cable guy. He is on me like a fucking leech. And I hate his fucking guts. He so badly wants to be friends. He goes out of his way to try and hook me up with girls I am not...
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I got all that I needed to get done today and a lot more. Gotta go back to work tomorrow but hell I need the money bad. I'll probably stick around for ot to make some more easy money. I hate to say this but I have this weird feeling of dread. Everything seems so dark and my anxiety is so high. I feel so...
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Well 4 days of ot in a row are over. I finally got 2 days off and I need to make the most of them-and I will. Have a lot of stuff to get done. Everyone at work always bitches when ot is needed(which it is every single night) but I really don't know why the heck the complain so much. They will only stay...
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I ain't ever been in love
don't know what is
please somebody help me!

I'm 29 and that's the way my life is
Sorry, just to afraid to really open up and take such a risk

Now you all no more about me than I usually allow.
Goodnight.Peace

It is my birthday. Please grant me one wish--peace!

O.k. it is my birthday this Saturday. I'll be 29. I am not really excited. I am old and it is just not the same as when you were young. Hell by this sites standard next year I'll be a "geezer" and will have to join the club(I think it is mandatory). I must admit I am a little depressed actually. Not because I will...
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