bepps

Since I only have one hand my typing speed has gone from astronomicaly fast to painstakingly slow. As such anything I write will be abriviated and I was rereading some of the things I've posted and they seem rude. No worries ma peoples, I surely am not trying to be rude at all.

Thanks to everyone who cared enough to say "awwwwww" to my last journal entry. Although I was just sayin what all happened and that I wont be responding near as much (I'll still be readin what all you folks are doin though). I'm not much for saying things so I can make people feel sorry for me. And I also never have people do things for me. For example, when I didn't have my license I could have gotten rides to work every day. I could have stayed with my boss (and friend) who lived around the corner. I could have gone down to newport beach and met some rich chick and gave her a sob story and made her want topay my tickets for me. I could have done any number of things to allow someone else to resolve the problem for me. But instead I rode a bicycle 60 miles a day to commute. I didn't give a shit, no one was gonna push me through my life for me even for one day or for one minute. Even when my sister makes dinner and I decide I'd rather eat that than something else she'll ask "hey you want some dinner?" "yea, i'll get some in a bit". I can't stand when people wait on me for anything. I feel so worthless like I can't even wipe my own ass.

I reread what I said and I think I overstated how bad it is. Although you wouldn't think so by looking at this monster fuckin cast on my arm. Which is now covered in "tattoos". I went nuts with the sharpie last night. First thing I made was an anchor on my forarm. And of course I had to put a heart that says MOM above it and MAMA below it. Oh and THUG 4 LIFE, and a teacup, an aquabat with WWW.THEAQUABATS.COM above it, and some airplanes, a lil skydiver dude, a guy bustin a hart attack, the yamaha symbol, and tons of checkers. I should have a lil splint put on tomarow when I go to the therapist. We'll be doin all kinds of finger calasthenics. "up .. down .. up .. down .. up .. down .. up .. down .. up .. down .. up .. down .. up .. down .. yea, you feel the burn? up .. down .. up .. down .. up .. down .. up .. down .. c'mon, just a few more finger lifts up .. down .. up .. down .. up .. down .. just a few more, you can do it" Maybe I'll make some tiny lil finger weights that look like arm weights to fit around my finger while I'm workin it out.

At my work I make molds that produce plastic parts. To do it, first I usually design the part itself (sometimes the customer already knows what they want and already have the part designed). Then I design the mold. Then we buy square blocks of steel (or aluminum depending on how many parts the mold will produce) and I use machines to cut the opposite of the part into the square blocks. Then the mold is put in a plastic press and it makes plastic parts. My boss sells the plastic parts and gets paid. And he is happy. Now that I cant constrict my left ring finger (or I'll tear the stitches the surgeon put in the tendon and the tendon will snap and go zippin back into my forarm where she'll have to slice all the way down my arm to get it and pull it back and sew it up again only to be back where I was (but worse off) before I snapped it) I only have one hand I can use. As such I cant use the machines to make the cavity in the mold bases. That only leaves CAD work that I can do. I should run out of that next week. After that I'm gonna have to take two er three weeks off. I was thinkin I might go to cancun with my brother n friends, but that's not til spring break. But it does look to be rather ragin down there so I might go.