pudding

yesterday was my two year wedding anniversary. it was all fine and good until i got a text from joe last night. it wasn't an awful or spiteful text, in a way it's thoughtfulness was worse than spite. spite i would have handled better. he opened with, "happy anniversary, lol." and from there he went on about how i seem happy now and he is glad for me and that in a way he will always love me because i was a lot of firsts in his life and then he ended by using an old pet name for me that i thought had gone the way of the dinosaur a long time ago. he was trying to be nice. i was sure he would have forgotten it was our anniversary. this was one of those things where, though it was nice that he remembered, it would have been much nicer if he had not sent anything at all and left me alone. thank god he didn't call. needless to say i didn't send him a message in response. silence was the most appropriate thing i could come up with. got a doctors appointment on monday, these headaches i've been getting are ridiculous and last most of the day. i'm kind of depressed lately and my everything hurts. see my shrink on monday as well. i have a few things to do today, including, but not limited to the purchasing of a garbage can with a lid for the bathroom. alpha (the little orange cat) likes to knock over my current waste basket and drag out cotton balls so he can shred them into tiny pieces and chase them all over the house. he's pesky like that. i don't feel like my blogs have been very good lately, most of them consist of "i'm never home" and "i don't feel good." but that is the state i'm in right now i guess. hopefully things will start to look up again soon. was the optimism just now? *ruler to knuckles* shame on me.