So many thoughts run through this weary head of mine lately. I can't seem to wrap my brain around the concept of love and relationships, and their many inner workings. The desire to attach myself to another is overwhelming at times, and completely lacking an equal amount of time. I cannot fathom trusting anyone enough to fully open my heart to the prospects of such...
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VIEW 17 of 17 COMMENTS
I am a lamer beyond belief. Stayed up all night fuckin around on here, and decided to reschedule my census interview/test for Wednesday. What a fag I am. Oh yeah, and the 'ol cell phone bill somehow went from $300 to $401.11....Hmmm, I fuckin hate T-mobile. They suck balls, and not in a good way 
Other developments:
Have an interview with a petsitting service later...
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Other developments:
Have an interview with a petsitting service later...
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VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
guitargeek:
Well, I like your ass just the way it is. If you want it smaller, that's fine too.
You're beautiful either way.
You're beautiful either way.
sandman3030:
What is wrong? I saw you on cam and you look like you where crying. Are you ok? I hate to see girls cry. 
Howdy all. It's been a strange weekend indeed. I just arrived home from taking Fat Al and Moto over to BlueValentines (their new home). Bless you Blue, for all you've done for me. I know theyre in great hands, and so am not as torn up over their departure as I would be had they gone to a strangers home.
On the job front, I...
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On the job front, I...
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VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
honsolo:
good luck on the job, it's nice that something good happened to you finaly 
Awww camming is always fun in the morning
Awww camming is always fun in the morning
french_frog:
how are you ? How is Austin ? super hot ?
you're kinda super star of the webcam, but everytime I see you I'm at work and I can't access to the chat because of the firewall.
you're kinda super star of the webcam, but everytime I see you I'm at work and I can't access to the chat because of the firewall.
At what point does becoming anti-social become terribly unhealthy? Is it when you feel deeply discordant with all life forms, or just when you cease to leave the house? Lately I live on Limewire and SG...I would like to go out, but why bother, I'll just get myself into trouble most likely. That, and I feel absolutely no connection with anyone at all. Of course...
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VIEW 13 of 13 COMMENTS
ericdravyn:
Ahhh... the Blackberry... if we could only hack it from afar... 
ericdravyn:
I was kinda hoping for naughty messages and saucy photos... hmmm...
I'm back from the land of lost souls, silicon tits, and H3's....also known as Dallas, or the 7th layer of hell as I like to affectionately refer to it.
My exodus into damnation began Monday when I agreed to chapparone my little brother to Dallas for a photography conference. I should never make decisions when sleep deprived...because I inevitably regret them once I have to...
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My exodus into damnation began Monday when I agreed to chapparone my little brother to Dallas for a photography conference. I should never make decisions when sleep deprived...because I inevitably regret them once I have to...
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VIEW 25 of 25 COMMENTS
variety:
Austin is the place to party, yes. And at times I do miss living there, but only at times. Not that San Antonio is any better, but I'd rather be there than Dallas... don't even start on Houston, YUCK 
trilobyte:
Yeah I noticed 
Aw shit. I'm getting my stuff together for my Dallas trip today. I'm just so fuckin excited about it, woofuckinhoo. So, I'm going to be outta the ol SG loop for a few days. I'll miss you crazy hobags. I will still be retrieving email via my piece o shit blackberry, in case someone dies or something, or anyone wants to get ahold of me...which...
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VIEW 13 of 13 COMMENTS
merkaba72:
.....scratch that last comment.
Incredibly, CUTE!
Incredibly, CUTE!
Ode to the Fourth...a day that is capable of inspiring the masses to bicker about politics like no other. It's almost as if my family was cloned several million times and we had a Christmas party. Come on people now, smile on your brothers, or some hippy shit like that.
Today was interesting. I awoke from never having slept to find that a bottle of...
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Today was interesting. I awoke from never having slept to find that a bottle of...
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VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
sonofabeach:
I left one pic up for you so there 
ps. Quantum Leap is the SHIZNIT YO!!!!
[Edited on Jul 05, 2005 7:44PM]
ps. Quantum Leap is the SHIZNIT YO!!!!
[Edited on Jul 05, 2005 7:44PM]
theiconoclast:
how convient that you are coming up here, i'm off wed - friday haha.
uh, get a hold of me before you head up. was good talking to you last night
- Icon
uh, get a hold of me before you head up. was good talking to you last night
- Icon
Have you ever done something so stupid that it is capable of rendering you astonished at your own behavior? Last night was awful in a number of ways. Went to a gathering of a few people that I didn't know all that well, and embarked on a ridiculously retarded adventure in substance abuse. I'm not spilling the beans about what substance, because ya'll would cringe...
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VIEW 13 of 13 COMMENTS
eurisko:
yeah... jan 16th rules, and neato does sound like such an 80s band. but yeah go us.
guitar_wolf:
Well, even if you did make an ass out of yourself I'll bet you are beating yourself up over it more than you should be. Plus, when you get fucked up you are allowed to do stupid shit from time to time.
Getting away from your curent group is the only way to get past behavior that they reinforce. Maybe your grief can be a catalyst for a good life change, but don't be too hard on yourself right now.
Getting away from your curent group is the only way to get past behavior that they reinforce. Maybe your grief can be a catalyst for a good life change, but don't be too hard on yourself right now.
You MotherFuckers Rock
Thanks for all the kick ass music recommendations! I may have to play this game more often. Though I did screw myself with this idea due to the fact I now have even more music to organize, burn, and add to my mp3 player. I'm just thankful I had the foresight to buy a player capable of holding 80GB. You'd think 80GB...
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Thanks for all the kick ass music recommendations! I may have to play this game more often. Though I did screw myself with this idea due to the fact I now have even more music to organize, burn, and add to my mp3 player. I'm just thankful I had the foresight to buy a player capable of holding 80GB. You'd think 80GB...
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VIEW 12 of 12 COMMENTS
bluevalentine:
anytime, really. I have to run a couple erands in the morning so, say, 1 or 2?
bepps:
Man, that's so similar to how I feel, it's almost as if I wrote that. With a few exceptions. I shall count the ways.
"-My accommodating personality is snowing these guys into thinking I'm better than I really am"
I don't know you all that well, really, but it's usually a safe bet that when someone says something like this they're probably selling themselves short. Everyone has imperfections. If we didn't notice them then we wouldn't improve ourselves, so it's extremely important to notice them so we can resolve them. However, all too often we seem to focus on them a lil too much and it ends up being unhealthy.
"-People are fucking lonely bastards. Each and every one of us at some point searches for solace in a member of the opposite sex, which is unhealthy at best"
God damn tootin!
"-Ongoing and unsuccessful efforts to "date me" would probably fizzle out the minute I agreed to such, or as soon as I slept with them. In other words you want what you can't have until you get it, at which point it becomes disinteresting."
I'm actually the exact opposite. If I see someone is interested in me I become a lot more interested in them. If I see that someone isn't interested in me at all I loose all interest in them as well. It extends deep into the rest of everything in my life. Of all of the sports cars, the one I'd rather have the most is a Lotus Esprit. I didn't have much interest in them until I saw how little they cost. Once I saw that obtaining one was feasible I got a lot more interested in it. Even though the Ferraris are better cars, I'll never have one so I don't care about them.
"You cannot tell a person you love them/are in love with them after knowing them one week and mean it. Why can't I have male friends that understand this?"
I wanna consider myself your friend and I haven't decided I love you and, even though you seem to be a really kick ass chick, I don't see myself proclaiming undying love for you anytime soon.
"Frankly, it upsets me because all my supposed "friendships" are becoming muddled with these delusions of love, which I suspect are a bunch of bullshit emotions caused by loneliness."
I would bet money that your suspicions are correct.
"I don't want to open myself up to heartbreak, feel dependent on another for happiness, or make a life with anyone at this time in my life. I simply want to enjoy life and figure out who the hell I am."
There you definitely do speak wisdom. Although me, I'm much less interested in finding out who I am than just doing whatever I want to do. Whether if I know who I am or not wont change much. I'll still be the same guy.
"Perhaps it's bitter, cynical, even pessimistic to feel the way I do...but it does keep me from have a broken heart daily."
I just see that as being logical and smart.
"I feel as if they're seeing the me they've created to comfort themselves"
Man, I've felt that sooooo much with the people I talk to online. Someone will proclaim their perpetual love to me and I think "Wow, you got all that from the 16kybtes of text that you've received from me in the 4 weeks that we've been chatting online? The love of your life is worth only 16KB?" Obviously, I never said that to anyone but I thought it many times. Of course their "undying love" fades out over a few weeks and thy find some other dude that they fall head over heels in love with. But I mean how do you tell someone "no, you're delusional. When you met me you filled in all the blanks of what you didn't know about me with what you wanted and turned me into some superhuman that I'm not"? Without absolutely destroying them, I mean. I tried once. It wasn't pretty. Now I make sure to not get into situations where that might happen. Well, I make it an objective to. Dunno if I actually do, but it's good to have objectives.
"-My accommodating personality is snowing these guys into thinking I'm better than I really am"
I don't know you all that well, really, but it's usually a safe bet that when someone says something like this they're probably selling themselves short. Everyone has imperfections. If we didn't notice them then we wouldn't improve ourselves, so it's extremely important to notice them so we can resolve them. However, all too often we seem to focus on them a lil too much and it ends up being unhealthy.
"-People are fucking lonely bastards. Each and every one of us at some point searches for solace in a member of the opposite sex, which is unhealthy at best"
God damn tootin!
"-Ongoing and unsuccessful efforts to "date me" would probably fizzle out the minute I agreed to such, or as soon as I slept with them. In other words you want what you can't have until you get it, at which point it becomes disinteresting."
I'm actually the exact opposite. If I see someone is interested in me I become a lot more interested in them. If I see that someone isn't interested in me at all I loose all interest in them as well. It extends deep into the rest of everything in my life. Of all of the sports cars, the one I'd rather have the most is a Lotus Esprit. I didn't have much interest in them until I saw how little they cost. Once I saw that obtaining one was feasible I got a lot more interested in it. Even though the Ferraris are better cars, I'll never have one so I don't care about them.
"You cannot tell a person you love them/are in love with them after knowing them one week and mean it. Why can't I have male friends that understand this?"
I wanna consider myself your friend and I haven't decided I love you and, even though you seem to be a really kick ass chick, I don't see myself proclaiming undying love for you anytime soon.
"Frankly, it upsets me because all my supposed "friendships" are becoming muddled with these delusions of love, which I suspect are a bunch of bullshit emotions caused by loneliness."
I would bet money that your suspicions are correct.
"I don't want to open myself up to heartbreak, feel dependent on another for happiness, or make a life with anyone at this time in my life. I simply want to enjoy life and figure out who the hell I am."
There you definitely do speak wisdom. Although me, I'm much less interested in finding out who I am than just doing whatever I want to do. Whether if I know who I am or not wont change much. I'll still be the same guy.
"Perhaps it's bitter, cynical, even pessimistic to feel the way I do...but it does keep me from have a broken heart daily."
I just see that as being logical and smart.
"I feel as if they're seeing the me they've created to comfort themselves"
Man, I've felt that sooooo much with the people I talk to online. Someone will proclaim their perpetual love to me and I think "Wow, you got all that from the 16kybtes of text that you've received from me in the 4 weeks that we've been chatting online? The love of your life is worth only 16KB?" Obviously, I never said that to anyone but I thought it many times. Of course their "undying love" fades out over a few weeks and thy find some other dude that they fall head over heels in love with. But I mean how do you tell someone "no, you're delusional. When you met me you filled in all the blanks of what you didn't know about me with what you wanted and turned me into some superhuman that I'm not"? Without absolutely destroying them, I mean. I tried once. It wasn't pretty. Now I make sure to not get into situations where that might happen. Well, I make it an objective to. Dunno if I actually do, but it's good to have objectives.
Howdy all. Well, I got a job...sorta. And I have the coolest boss in the world 
And my job involves cheesecake...what could be better? In other work related news, I received a certified letter from the ol clinic. It was my last paycheck...check it, a whopping $108.29, yeehaw...along with a "Seperation Notice." These piddling insignificant fucks try so hard to be corporate fascists, but it...
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And my job involves cheesecake...what could be better? In other work related news, I received a certified letter from the ol clinic. It was my last paycheck...check it, a whopping $108.29, yeehaw...along with a "Seperation Notice." These piddling insignificant fucks try so hard to be corporate fascists, but it... Read More
VIEW 19 of 19 COMMENTS
kevinski:
Burn them as raw MP3 files. Don't try burning that much music to regular audio CD's. You'll probably miss a major holiday if you try something like that. This way, you'll only need to burn approximately 60-something CD's, as opposed to God only knows how many
cmaxwell:
Love.
As in Arthur Lee.
As in Arthur Lee.
sides id be knocked out for days if i survived at all
tjhanks for the offer though