angels turned to dust as the night faded and rememered things i lost years ago, someone elses lost hallucination that made its way through the the bleeding skies that seemed to cradle the city and all her lost childen, me being one of them with poisons in the my gut, random poems and words flowing through electric pockets in my brain and all the walls...
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VIEW 25 of 42 COMMENTS
mikael:
Godspeed you, darling Lily..
toy:
i am so glad you got out from jail. kiss.
please keep your thoughts and hearts with me during the next three days, I'm serious. pray, or send me good energy, whatever you prefer.
Love, Lil
Love, Lil
VIEW 25 of 40 COMMENTS
boo1:
Shank'ya for the words of Tupac....Im bettin $$$ that you bought that DVD he came out with not too long ago, didnt ya! 
Oh and also, I just got done watching "Monster"......that was SO fucked up....I was trying to figure out why it upset me so badly that Christina Ricci fucked Charlize Theron over....sadly its b/c I guess I can relate to Aileen Wuornos....I'm not a hooker nor have I killed anyone....but she was willing to do anything for Christina Ricci and she loved her so much and she was a bit crazy and no one ever loved her. Quite alot like me. how are things on yer end???
[Edited on Oct 02, 2004 2:28PM]
Oh and also, I just got done watching "Monster"......that was SO fucked up....I was trying to figure out why it upset me so badly that Christina Ricci fucked Charlize Theron over....sadly its b/c I guess I can relate to Aileen Wuornos....I'm not a hooker nor have I killed anyone....but she was willing to do anything for Christina Ricci and she loved her so much and she was a bit crazy and no one ever loved her. Quite alot like me. how are things on yer end???[Edited on Oct 02, 2004 2:28PM]
synnove:
my thoughts are with you lady 
Queen of early constellations, I woke up with blood in my brain. I tried to kill a man in my dreams. Trigger finger got fucked and now i'm awake and wishing he was dead. Killing off thoughts of desolation/seperation. But its deeper than inside my head, It's here, all around me/us. I can't seem to cure this disease, or anyone elses. I was copping rachel...
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VIEW 25 of 29 COMMENTS
albertine:
thank you.
I wish I could run.
I wish I could run.
mora:
i know you said you disown me if i didnt do another set. well i tried, and it got rejeeeeeeected. so you can disown me now.
i agree with what LE said about running. you do what you have to.
i agree with what LE said about running. you do what you have to.
Just a virus, collecting infectuous dreams that lost all color and sense of hope. She walks like maybe she's been beat down in that corner before, Sometimes i think maybe even without legs that homegirl would find a way to walk. I hold little secrets she whispers in my ear makes its way into blackened dreams. Don't release your breath till its over.
-In korea...
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-In korea...
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VIEW 25 of 39 COMMENTS
mei:
see, for a long time i was sure that when we die we are dead. but then, then i saw an angel. i was sleeping in my parents' bed and i woke up and there it was, all white and glowy and christmas-cardy standing there radiating benevolence. and i thought, "oh, that's nice, an angel," in that sleepy accepting way. and fell back asleep. and thought, with my eyes closed, "wait a second... angels don't just appear in peoples' rooms..." and opened my eyes and it was gone. so i believe in angels, and i'm sure that has something to do with what happens to us when we die. but i'm not exactly sure what.
blacknblue:
Thanks for the welcome!!!
The whole dying part of life is a tough subject to figure out, but my theories are banking on just rotting. I dunno if that's pessimistic or not.
The whole dying part of life is a tough subject to figure out, but my theories are banking on just rotting. I dunno if that's pessimistic or not.
I hope i die after you, just so i can get the satisfaction of spitting on the floor at your funeral, or maybe in your casket, Whichever one seems more offensive at the time.
Would you look down and laugh? and pretend that we're still sleeping in the glass in detroit with conterfeit money in our pockets.
Sleeping on the roof at C Squat gets...
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Would you look down and laugh? and pretend that we're still sleeping in the glass in detroit with conterfeit money in our pockets.
Sleeping on the roof at C Squat gets...
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VIEW 18 of 18 COMMENTS
molly:
Your journals are brilliant. If you ever need a coffee, write me. We'll meet at May Day
tori:
i did what i could for the kids short of kidnapping them. i got in touch with a number of different state run services that probably wont do shit. but hopefully the mom will be scared into cutting back a bit on the drugs.
sadly, i doubt the rnc people are gonna get much of anything. somehow i just am too jaded to believe in endings like that.
why are you on the roof of c (as opposed to inside)? i remember being there in the winter and there was no fuckin heat... me and dave and shane and some other people were trying to jam. i couldn't move my fingers. it was rough. serenity wasn't a whole lot better though. they kept blowing fuses cause everyone was using space heaters....
ehhh. regardless, i hope you and everyone at c is doing well.
sadly, i doubt the rnc people are gonna get much of anything. somehow i just am too jaded to believe in endings like that.
why are you on the roof of c (as opposed to inside)? i remember being there in the winter and there was no fuckin heat... me and dave and shane and some other people were trying to jam. i couldn't move my fingers. it was rough. serenity wasn't a whole lot better though. they kept blowing fuses cause everyone was using space heaters....
ehhh. regardless, i hope you and everyone at c is doing well.
both my homeboys got arrested at the protests. i didn't really understand why. I guess nowadays throwing rocks in windows and tagging and blocking traffic is called "disturbing the peace". pfffffffffft. anyways i was too quick. It sucked having to wait like 3 days to see their dirty tired ass eyes again though. They arrested like 1,600 protesters here. speaking of jail i got my...
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VIEW 20 of 20 COMMENTS
mamabunny:
you know
i love you Gypsy girl.
i love you Gypsy girl.
jakelafrontiere:
I think I 've seen you on the street; hope I get to say hello to you before you go into the system. Try to live a long long life--you won't be able to provoke anyone if you're dead.
I didn't mean to run from you. I just was so scared to lose my freedom. anyone who has sat in a jail cell for more than a few days knows, actually more than a few weeks knows what the fuck i mean about that. I put out my thumb and jumped in the first car that pulled to the side, leaving you both worried...
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VIEW 17 of 17 COMMENTS
pumpkineater:
its so silly to complain about a couple hours, but in that time being snatched away so quickly and suddenly away from you felt like someone had ripped my heart out. if there wasnt a certain loud obnoxious boy around, i would've felt so much worse. i probably got you sick.
sa rahng heh, na oh mi.
sa rahng heh, na oh mi.
siqkat:
How were th protests? How are you now? 
riots in new york. i listened to these guys freestyle and dance and alot of my tralever squatter homeboys and girls are coming for this protest agaisnt the republican convention. I think i got my court date delayed again. i keep prolonging this jail shit but i need more time to get off the methadone. that shit is fucked by the way, if you're a...
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VIEW 23 of 23 COMMENTS
ilsa:
Hey thanks for your comment, I hope you can prolong the jail as long as you can, so I can read your journal often. If not, you should write me from jail! 
Good luck with the methadone thing and don't let drugs control you. I feel kinda identified with you when I read your journal because my ex bf did a lot of drugs (everything except heroin) and they're hard to quit, but you seem strong and I'm sure you'll do it.
Good luck with the methadone thing and don't let drugs control you. I feel kinda identified with you when I read your journal because my ex bf did a lot of drugs (everything except heroin) and they're hard to quit, but you seem strong and I'm sure you'll do it.
pumpkineater:
lily.................................................................................................................................................................................soon. support. comfort. back here............
love,
p
love,
p
they say all great empires fall, and thats me falling. just a few more days and i'll be locked in a cell. i can't use pretty words for this cause its just not pretty. they've been rapidly detoxing off of methadone and i'm in so much physical pain. i can feel poisons leaking out of my bones and it hurts. we all have strange lives,...
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VIEW 25 of 29 COMMENTS
karma2:
found it
ilsa:
I always read your journal because I love the way you write but I've never left you a comment...
How long are you gonna be in jail? Good luck
PS- if you want ppl to buy you things from your whislist you've to enter a shipping adress.
How long are you gonna be in jail? Good luck
PS- if you want ppl to buy you things from your whislist you've to enter a shipping adress.
Somewhere in her words i lost the need to self destruct, maybe if i could sit next to her on the park bench every day and study the lines in her face, trace her human heart shaped jail tattoo. She knows about the fire in our hearts. How sometimes the fire takes over and we die or are left broken. me and dee are broken...
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VIEW 18 of 18 COMMENTS
itzie:
you really are amazing
brandy:
Where you at these days?