zoomusikgrl

i'm sort of okay with everything with vimes. i'm respecting his space and privacy and keeping the bulk of it offline (especially here) so i can't really explain why it happened. but it's okay. there was no malice or spite or any unnecessary emotions. it is what it is.

i dunno. i'm actually quite surprised at how okay i'm feeling about it. he's doing his thing, i'm doing my thing, and i have no idea what the future holds. we are still on good terms, we're still talking on the regular, and as long as i still have him in my life in some capacity, i don't feel like i lost. granted, i am sad, but mostly i'm feeling optimistic about the future. whatever the heck that means.

so for the moment, that's that.

LOL...but i think the whole dating thing- with ANYBODY- ain't happening for a looooooong time. ain't nothin' can top a man like that. i said to jackskellington3 at the last sgny event that i was still getting used to being off the market for good, and how relieved i was to never go through the murky swamp that is dating ever again. so i think for now, i'm just going to go with that.

i'm not bitter, or angry, or anything. i don't hold any sort of grudge against sg, be it the powers that be or the members of the community. this has nothing to do with me and vimes' breakup. i just feel like i've grown out of it. that month i took off from here made me realize that i didn't really miss it much. i have no desire to be an sg anymore. i haven't looked at a set in months. i've always had another blog that i keep up with. people on my friends list seem to be leaving in droves. so i kinda just don't care much anymore. i'd rather focus on more important shit.

but it was not a wasted experience. i made it into the book! i've gone more places and done more things in the past 3 years than i have in a damn long. i mean shit, i never thought i'd like fuckin maryland as much as i do. i've made some incredible friends, who i can still see and talk to outside of sg.( the few of you on my friends list that haven't tracked me down on any of the million other sites i'm on, you can't possibly be looking hard enough. i'm the only zoomusikgrl on the intarwebs. ) and not for nothin', but i think i'd be hard pressed to find a regional event in my area that wouldn't let me show up just because my shit expired after three years.

since we all know that i've threatened this before, i won't yet say either way what i'm going to do. and if i leave and then change my mind for the umpteenth time, i still have a backup free year code from one of my many rejected sets. but i will never ever pay for sg, not for all the tit i've shown.