zachdisaster

the mind is corroding

epic failures abound. why can i not just decide the fate of this scenario? maybe it's because i'm distracted...i watch this ribbon of road and sand mountains for hours in the dark through a green glow with a hand on an automatic weapon. dude, this desert fox is following me...i swear, i've seen it on every mission in this country, overpopulation or new friend? yeah i'm distracted, and being this far away gives me a right to care less. so screw your pseudo-love talk and relationship dynamics architecture. less complexity more...reality. and all the while it's like...it would just be easier with less communication and if i were shooting a lot more we wouldn't be in this dilemma. house to house not hanging on a phone call with a room full of hushed voices. dirty talk...in the mwr...i mean pda and on the sly sure but this fuckin guy over here, fuck. it's pure thought vomit up here. the fox, and the shooting (or not enough of), stupid advice, the fact that these problems are being dropped while i'm in country...waste of existence. so...sack up and fuck off, or care and give in. or just walk away....combat is easier, free thinking on personal issues goes out the window. bare instinctual survival or you know, aka my best confidant. yeah, keep eating away at the little free time we get, that's smart. handful of pissed off individuals with loaded pieces and no one to kill right now. whatever, drive on or something. definitely fantasy world i see, which means low focus and my ulterior motive: stay distracted. fuck real society, i rather play in the desert. the fox is following me...he looked straight at me through the NODs i'm telling you.