second eyezapping scheduled for friday, july 22nd.
anyone wanna come take care of me??
anyone??
my first breakup was in 7th grade. teresa walling. she returned to my school the summer before 7th grade after leaving in 4th. she had lost her baby fat and gay ass permed hair. we bonded. we had matching jean jackets and BFF necklaces. we hung out all summer and in october, after we returned to school, she found that the 'cool kids' now wanted to be friends with the new, thin and developed teresa. she dumped me shortly after. i was crushed. she was the first 'real friend' i'd had. but i wasn't ever going to be allowed in the cool crowd, so i had to go.
i quit eating after that. i was down to 2 soup packages of club crakers a day before my mom realized. she found and read a journal i kept filled with letters to all the kids in school i hated stating that would regret how they treated me if i died. mom spazed and sent me to st francis ward for the crazies. here was the mistake. they put a 12 year old girl from a small catholic gade school in with city school adolescents. teenagers that had serious drug, sex and rage problems. a 'day school' of kids that brought in qualudes and narcotics. girls that gave head to guys during 'movie time'. more swear words and cigarette smoking than i'd ever been exposed to.
i left there, 28 days later, a completely different and much more rebellious child.
my mom tried to buy my forgiveness with a car filled with clothes. benetton, limited, some 'pink' brand i no longer remember and a coach bag ( i was the first kid i knew with a coach bag.) i retaliated by shaving the back of my waist length blond hair off, sneaking out with 16 year olds to drink forties of old e, or mad dog. defacing my fathers officer jacket from the military. enbarassing them in a school play by reciting poe's "the tell tale heart", complete with a bloody cow heart stolen from the bio labb. smoking and letting boys feel me up.
if i ever have a child, god, i beg of you not to let her be anything like me.
-me
anyone wanna come take care of me??
anyone??
my first breakup was in 7th grade. teresa walling. she returned to my school the summer before 7th grade after leaving in 4th. she had lost her baby fat and gay ass permed hair. we bonded. we had matching jean jackets and BFF necklaces. we hung out all summer and in october, after we returned to school, she found that the 'cool kids' now wanted to be friends with the new, thin and developed teresa. she dumped me shortly after. i was crushed. she was the first 'real friend' i'd had. but i wasn't ever going to be allowed in the cool crowd, so i had to go.
i quit eating after that. i was down to 2 soup packages of club crakers a day before my mom realized. she found and read a journal i kept filled with letters to all the kids in school i hated stating that would regret how they treated me if i died. mom spazed and sent me to st francis ward for the crazies. here was the mistake. they put a 12 year old girl from a small catholic gade school in with city school adolescents. teenagers that had serious drug, sex and rage problems. a 'day school' of kids that brought in qualudes and narcotics. girls that gave head to guys during 'movie time'. more swear words and cigarette smoking than i'd ever been exposed to.
i left there, 28 days later, a completely different and much more rebellious child.
my mom tried to buy my forgiveness with a car filled with clothes. benetton, limited, some 'pink' brand i no longer remember and a coach bag ( i was the first kid i knew with a coach bag.) i retaliated by shaving the back of my waist length blond hair off, sneaking out with 16 year olds to drink forties of old e, or mad dog. defacing my fathers officer jacket from the military. enbarassing them in a school play by reciting poe's "the tell tale heart", complete with a bloody cow heart stolen from the bio labb. smoking and letting boys feel me up.
if i ever have a child, god, i beg of you not to let her be anything like me.
-me
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
alas i have none