wolfang666

while I am feeling this I need to write it down so i can get everything out. My grandpa the only one I have just died five minuets ago he was 90. He was in pain all he time so I am happy that he is not any more but I am still not sure what i feel. I am kind of numb to the whole thing im sitting here trying to decide what to feel and I dont know I do know I dont want to be alone right now but I am my friends are all asleep and I dont have a girlfriend my family is out of town. I have never felt so alone as I do right now. this sucks I think I am going to cry sitting alone at my place and cry awesome and im writing this down on a sight with naked women. no one on here can do anything about its sad that the only place i have to go is here in order to feel like im with someone. damn I just want to sit and hold someone and feel like im ok but i cant and im not. I have to replace porn with actual relationships what a douche no matter how hard i try to be a good person to be a gentlemen to be kind I still see douche bags getting all the girls my morals ruin my life, and now im crying that sucks but im just going to keep typing at least it lets me get all this out. So im alone sitting here wishing i had someone i could hold right now. my brain doesn't want to work it just wants to shut down. somebody anybody please i need someone to text or to talk to no one is answering their phone.