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wild_zero

atlanta

Member Since 2004

Followers 22 Following 25

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Wednesday Jun 30, 2004

Jun 29, 2004
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well, that was ridiculous. i suppose i got what i wanted, but not really since i'm not making out with anyone right now, and instead typing this. at the very least, to count the blessings for the day: three more pages of introspection. wanted to write more of the dialogue story, but just couldn't do it.

recieved two useless phone calls today. one, from the gas company to inform me of nothing. re-read the meter first, god damnit. two, a hiring agency that doesn't know how to do its job. why would i leave out relevant job experience from my resume? if i'm not a match, don't call me. both arrived at 5 pm on the dot, while i was trying to eat some food.

tomorrow is the google interview. i'm dreading this. according to friends, i should have reference books handy. seems so involved for such a simple interview. nothing in my resume suggests i'm qualified as a sysadmin. and by my own admission, it's just a hobby. truth.

it's getting to the point where i'm going to have to lie to get a job. rejection is such a fierce enemy of me. my problem is that i've got self-confidence, unlike other computer science geeks. i know i can do any job people put in front of me, so it really bothers me when others can't see that.

i set my alarum to noon. that should suffice.

hey, i did exercise today. that much is good. can't exactly compensate for the amount of fat and smoke and other poisons i keep putting into my body, but at least i did it. and i'm going to do it again tomorrow. and the day after.

i left my bowl in my glove compartment. i forgot.

it's funny to try and pretend that i'm going to be employed right around the corner. each day, i'm out and spending cash on food and coffee. i'm also trying to meet new people, specifically, women.

of course, such a lifestyle is breaking down slowly. ever present, the Fear decides to show its ugly face and reminds me that things are finite. also, that my state is quite open-ended and dependent on acquiring a job. my favorite topic of conversation.

beating me when i'm down. frown
randumb_thought:
amen to every damn thing you said.
Jul 1, 2004

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    great. now, i'm physically ill, too.

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