so i put up a story on the writer's group. it'll be interesting to get feedback. i'm somewhat annoyed by my writing style, so i'm interested to see if anyone thinks what i think about it. my main concern is the lack of sustainability. i'm not sure someone can deal with an entire novel of my crap. i became aware of this recently after reading "choke" by palahniuk. there were definitely places in that book where i was annoyed by the predictability of his devices. i found myself just glossing over them quickly, and hated it.
there's too much "i" in my writing. what is this, "anthem"? fuck that. it's a terrible thing to force myself into writing a paragraph devoid of "i" as a subject. it's unfortunate that this must be done, if evolution as a writer is to occur. at the very least, new sentence structures are rediscovered and placed into the catacombs of my mind for future use.
too many things happened this weekend. brett emerged from tallahassee to see the squarepusher show. the dumb bastard only had one show in the entire southeast, appearently. so a good hour and a half was spent outside badgering people for an extra ticket. finally, some fat asshat had one.
asshat: "yeah, i got a ticket"
me: "i'll buy it for $20."
asshat: "uh, can you make it $30?"
me: "no, i'm paying $20 for it. you can buy yourself a beer or something."
asshat: "uh, ok, $20 and you buy me a beer inside."
me: "yeah, whatever."
most certainly, he did not get his extra beer for squabbling $10 out of me. this is a personal victory over the forces of robots that conspire to destroy my freewill.
unfortunately, three mysterious pbr appeared on my tab. so i suppose the robots won again.
see, it's always a struggle.
there's too much "i" in my writing. what is this, "anthem"? fuck that. it's a terrible thing to force myself into writing a paragraph devoid of "i" as a subject. it's unfortunate that this must be done, if evolution as a writer is to occur. at the very least, new sentence structures are rediscovered and placed into the catacombs of my mind for future use.
too many things happened this weekend. brett emerged from tallahassee to see the squarepusher show. the dumb bastard only had one show in the entire southeast, appearently. so a good hour and a half was spent outside badgering people for an extra ticket. finally, some fat asshat had one.
asshat: "yeah, i got a ticket"
me: "i'll buy it for $20."
asshat: "uh, can you make it $30?"
me: "no, i'm paying $20 for it. you can buy yourself a beer or something."
asshat: "uh, ok, $20 and you buy me a beer inside."
me: "yeah, whatever."
most certainly, he did not get his extra beer for squabbling $10 out of me. this is a personal victory over the forces of robots that conspire to destroy my freewill.
unfortunately, three mysterious pbr appeared on my tab. so i suppose the robots won again.
see, it's always a struggle.