I have returned.
Let me tell you a story. I call it
"Last Wednesday.
or:
I should have been at IGUN.
I went to work in the Bowling Green store, once again. A mere 2 blocks from Uptown where I should have been chilling, listening to some muzak. I nearly fell asleep at the wheel several times on the way to BG. I was rather tired, to say the absolute least. I Pulled up and parked on main street in the front of the store since it's far closer than the back parking lot, and I didn't feel up to walking in the cold. Upon arriving, I discovered that the bake for the day was a mere $900. A typical bake would be between $1200 and $2000 That's all well and good, small bake, not much work, yadda yadda... except that they scheduled two of us in there, when it most definitely could have been done by one person. (one person with half a left arm, three feet, and a frontal lobotomy.) I didn't need to be there. I worked till about 4 am, before I started feeling nauseous from fatigue. I told the other baker that I had been sick for the past 2 days, and that I needed to go home. (which was true, just not the past 2 days) He agreed, so, after about 12 tries at jabbing randomly at the dimly lit keyboard on the time clock, I punched out, tossed on my coat, and headed out the door. I walked about half a block before I realized I'd walked past my car. I walked past again, face buried in the chest of my coat against the cold. I looked up again. Still no car. I turned around. No car there either. I looked up further into the face of a smugly smirking parking sign which quite rudely informed me that the spot in which I had chosen to stop and exit my car was a towing zone from 3 till 5 in the morning. Fan-goddamn-tastic. I walked back into the store, setting off the alarm which was reset behind me the first time, and called the police station, who told me I could come pay a parking ticket and pick up my car. Back out again into the cold night.. morning..the cold something, and walked another three blocks down the street to the police station. Naturally, they wouldn't take a credit card, so I had to walk around the corner to the ATM, discover I'd left my ATM card at home, call the credit card company, get a PIN, and finally retrieve 20 precious dollars which I promptly dropped from my now-frozen hands into the wind, and chased down the parking lot. I paid my fine, and learned that my car was at the towing company which was, again, not in the neighborhood. I swore very politely at the police receptionist and walked outside where I called the towing agency and demanded that they pick me up at the police station. The passenger door of the tow truck would not latch closed, and the seatbelt was nowhere in sight. I did not care. We arrived at the lot where I started to get out of the truck's gaping door, when the driver asked me for my sixty-seven dollars fee. Keep in mind that I had to go to an ATM for twenty. A asked him to drive me back by the ATM. He did so. I was only able to retrieve 40 dollars from my account, bringing my total fundage for the evening to fifty dollars. He needed sixty-seven. He must have taken pity on me in my state, since he told me that he would take fifty. I happened to find another ten dollars in my coat which I gave him, and got into my car. I eased my car onto the highway, and when I woke up, I was in the parking lot of my apartment. I'm sure glad the 'Ol Buick Regal knows the way home. They don't build 'em like that anymore, folks.
That's my story. I hope you liked it. I don't mind if you didn't read it. It was long, you have better things to do. I just thought I'd share. Toodleooo.
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xoxo
PS - did you see the lovely cat pic on my page?? tee hee...
Just making sure the bread industry hasn't consumed you yet. Get it!? Bread? Consumed? HAHAHAHAHa ha... ha... ... ... ha...
*sigh* I'm stupid.